Why So Sour, Sweetie?

I don’t know if it’s the odd choice of weapon or simply the fact that it involves McDonald’s, but I’m reminded of Marvin the McChicken guy when I read this story. Florida man from Zephyrhills arrested after striking woman with Sweet ‘N Sour Sauce packets

He became angry when a woman identified in the arrest affidavit as the mother of his child bought the wrong food at McDonald’s.
A verbal altercation over the June 30 order became physical, the woman told deputies, when Ferrer began striking her in the head and face with Sweet ‘N Sour Sauce packets.
The woman grabbed the man’s beard, and a struggle ensued. Ferrer pinned her to the ground, placed his palm onto her face and pressed her head into the ground using his body weight, the affidavit states.

To her credit, she was having none of this shit. Back to the beard she went, this time managing to pull a chunk out. I bet that hurt like hell, which likely explains why he let her up and she was able to get away.

Jesus Oscar Ferrer, Jr. has been charged with felony battery.

What the wrong food was wasn’t noted, but I’m putting my money on nuggets assuming that the packets in question came from the McDonald’s bag and not elsewhere in the house. Does McDonald’s sell anything else that you would want to put Sweet ‘N Sour Sauce on?

If You Think You’re Going To Scam Me From A Distance, You’re Right. But It’s Going To Be From A Different Distance, By God

This news report is written so terribly that I thought it had to be fake, but it’s verified by Randy Cassingham’s This is True. So if it’s good enough for him, it’s good enough for me. And thank goodness it’s good enough for him, because I’d hate to think that I just literally slapped myself in the head because of a damn hoax.

I’d rewrite the story so it could be told in something resembling proper English, but I’m going to go ahead and quote some of it in the hope that William Padmore Googles his own name and gets to read his own writing for the first time.

Officer Angela Sands says the Texan told Lincoln police that a woman he met through social media app Hangouts, and had tried to convince him to buy an Amazon Gift Card for her.
“He grew concerned it might be a scam,” says Sands. “So he decided he was going to drive to Lincoln, Nebraska to see the women in person first.”
So, the man traveled roughly 530 miles from Stinnet Texas to a Lincoln address provided by the woman over the app.
“One he messaged her and said he was at the address, she said she would let him inside and she would agree to have sex with him only after he sent a picture of the Amazon gift card and the scratched off number so she could use it,” says Sands.
The victim followed through, but the address provided did not belong to the woman in question.
The women then proceeded to block the victim from contacting though the app once the gift card money had been transferred.

This schmuck, who police did not identify, is now out $65 for the gift card and an undisclosed amount for the gas it took to drive the eight and a half hours to get conned.

Pool Fool

Problem: You have an inflatable pool that you don’t have the means to inflate.
Solution: Drive it into town and get it inflated there.
Problem: Now you have to get it back home and there’s no way it’s fitting in the car.
Solution: Alright kids, time to start earning your keep.

A mother in Dixon, Illinois was arrested Tuesday after she allegedly had her two daughters sit in an inflatable pool on her car’s roof. Jennifer A. Janus Yeager, 49, was using them to anchor down the pool while she drove from a friend’s home, where she had inflated it, according to the local police department.
Cops got a call from a witness about an Audi passenger car. It featured the aforementioned pool with the children on top, authorities said. Police searched the area, found the vehicle, and conducted a traffic stop.

She was charged with two counts each of endangering the health or life of a child and reckless conduct and was also cited for failure to properly secure her passengers.

I Don’t Think Affordable Means What You Think It Means

The main point of this is that these assholes got a permit to build one thing and built something completely different, which is garbage. The second big thing here is that the damn city could have fined them even more heavily and didn’t, which could potentially wind up being garbage. But my mind keeps getting stuck on this bit here.

Sunshine Enterprises was permitted to rebuild and expand two motels — the Pacific Sands and a Travelodge — that were among a dwindling number of affordable accommodations along a tourist-heavy strip of pricey hotels near the Santa Monica Pier. The new hotel would not offer a bar, restaurant, spa or other “luxury” amenities and rooms would cost about $165 a night, according to the permit application.
But the company let that permit expire and instead built the boutique Shore Hotel, where rooms with a “bed and breakfast package” start at around $300 and ones featuring Pacific Ocean views can run up to $800, documents show.

Buhbuhbuh whaaaaaaaaat!? $165 a night for a place that sounds so stripped down that I’ll be lucky if my room comes with its own door is affordable? How about no? Does no work for ya? Perhaps I’m forgetting something, but even the shittiest hotels I’ve stayed in had a damn restaurant. A lot of them even had pools, for goodness sake. Some of them may have been a little green, but the effort was there. What they’re describing here basically sounds like legalized robbery. Maybe the standards are different because of the beautiful coast, but for that price I’d think about sleeping on the fucking beach and taking it in that way. Jesus.

Waterloo Region Roadside Fresh Food Map

When I was a kid, we generally lived either out in the country or close enough to it that it was a decent bet that we would find somebody selling corn on the cob and all kinds of other fresh fruit and vegetables while we were out driving around. And years later while Carin and I were in Guelph there was a guy who used to set up shop in a parking lot not far from us and sell on behalf of some farmers, so that was handy. We haven’t had that same sort of good fortune here in Kitchener, although that’s not to say we haven’t found some good places to get things. They’re here, it just takes more effort to find and get to them when you don’t own a car and wouldn’t be allowed to drive one if you did.

All of that to say that while I’m not sure how much regular use we’re going to be getting out of this new Waterloo Region Farm Gate program ourselves, the rest of you had better be using the hell out of it because it’s a pretty cool idea.

Residents with an appetite for fresh, locally grown foods and an eagerness to support local farmers can now plan shopping adventures, thanks to a new Farm Gate map developed by the region’s tourism and marketing organization, Explore Waterloo Region.
Although a drive through the region’s countryside often reveals surprise roadside stands offering everything from summer sausage and eggs to freshly picked fruits and vegetables, Explore Waterloo wants to turn those happenstance fresh farm finds into planned destinations.
Explore Waterloo Region has developed a map to help residents locate farm produce stands, dubbed farm gates, which includes farms in Cambridge, North Dumfries and Ayr, as well as Woolwich and Wellesley townships.


If you know of one they don’t have, you can tweet a photo and the location of it to @ExploreWR using the hashtag #ExploreWRFarmGates. I assume that’ll work on the other social medias too, but I am old and have no idea how most of them work. Every entry they get between now and midnight on August 16th will be entered into a draw for a $100 gift card for either Jacob’s Grill in St. Jacobs or Marbles Restaurant in UpTown Waterloo, two places I’ll confess I don’t think I’ve been to.

The map and more information are here, so go enjoy some food. And if you want to pick up something for your favourite blogger to say thanks for the years of free entertainment while you’re at it, that would be nice. Maybe you could even grab something for me too.

Slurp Clank Doom

We all know at least one person who loses his damn mind over things like the sound of chewing, slurping or silverware hitting someone’s teeth. And guess what. All those times you’ve wondered either to yourself or out loud about whether there’s something wrong with him, you were right. There is in fact a name for that. No, not moody pain in the ass, eeven though that one’s often accurate. It’s actually called Misophonia, and it can be quite rough for some people.

“For people who suffer,” says Jennifer Brout, a psychologist in Westport, Connecticut, who specializes in treating children with misophonia, “it’s as though the brain misinterprets the auditory stimuli and experiences it as harmful or toxic or dangerous.” The body responds, she says, by going into fight-or flight-mode. “It happens,” she adds, “in a millisecond.”
To help explain the mechanics of misophonia, Brout uses the example of a sleeping dog hearing, say, a door clicking shut. “The dog’s response is to wake up and think, is that something I need to be aware of?” If so, the dog barks or runs off to hide. If not, the dog goes back to sleep and pays no more attention to the sound. “In misophonia, there is no decrease in response; there is an increase,” Brout says. “You just keep alerting to the sound.”

Eventually, she stumbled upon the work of Pawel and Margaret Jastreboff, doctors who were treating patients at Emory University for tinnitus, a ringing in the ears, and hyperacusis, conditions in which sound is perceived as abnormally loud or physically painful. The couple noticed that some of their subjects had a specific type of decreased sound tolerance, where specific patterns of sounds, rather than decibel levels, set them off. Something, they hypothesized, was amiss between the auditory pathways in the brain and the pathways in which emotions are processed. In 2001, the Jastreboffs proposed the name for this condition, calling it misophonia, which means hatred of sound.

That’s As Queer As A $25 Bill…Wait, What?

I just learned something. Canada used to have a $25 bill.

Front of the Canadian $25 bill, which is a real thing that used to exist.
No officer, this is not a counterfeit. Honest.

It was a limited-edition commemorative banknote, issued only for a short period in 1935 to in honour of the silver jubilee of King George V, Canada’s reigning monarch at the time. The note features a portrait of the King alongside his wife, Queen Mary.
There are approximately 1,840 of these bills and they’re still legal tender, meaning you could technically take one to a store and make a purchase if you had one.

If you want to do that, you’ll need to do it soon. As of January 1st, 2021, they, along with our old $1, $2, $500 and $1000 bills will be losing that legal tender status. After that, it will no longer be lawful to confuse the living heck out of the poor kids behind the counters of our land.

Personally, I’d hang on to that $25. I imagine it’s going to be worth a good bit more than that if it isn’t already. And hey, even if it isn’t, it makes for a cool conversation piece.

Pirates And Creators Living Together! Mass Hysteria!

After decades of wasted effort and billions in wasted money, it’s good to see that somebody is finally starting to figure this out.

There will always be online piracy. That’s just a fact. No amount of enforcement or revenue choking or anything else you can think of will ever stamp it out completely. At best maybe you can drive it further underground, but at this point even that’s a stretch. If you kill one, three more pop up to replace it. It’s been that way for years. And even if somehow you get a decent handle on one aspect of it, somebody is going to unleash some sort of new technology and we’re right back where we started. So instead of continually crying poor as you set your money on fire and toss it down the futility hole, why not come up with a system that might actually accomplish something worthwhile for everyone?

A few weeks ago, we reported that anti-piracy company DMCAForce offered a rather unique partnership to torrent and streaming sites.
Where many companies in the advertising industry do their best to avoid sites that are linked to piracy, the San Diego-based company takes the opposite approach.
In an email, the company promised the sites a revenue-sharing opportunity. Instead of removing a link or file, they can remain up, if the site owner agrees to share part of its advertising space.
“DMCAForce recently launched a new way for File Sharing sites to work with content creators. Where you as the file sharing site can distribute their content for free, but in exchange provide the advertising space around the product,” the email read.

“We chose this approach as corporations, large to small, constantly pay DMCAForce and our other companies like DigiRegs, for services to remove content all day every day,” Bauman said.
“It’s a loss on the content creators books to pay us, but a necessary job that needs to be done. To further that, it’s a loss on the books of the place it’s taken from, as it is technically ad space for users who are looking for their product.”
When copyright holders have to pay to remove content and site owners lose appealing content and advertising space, nobody wins.

The key to this being successful is the very thing we don’t learn here. What are the revenue splits? And unfortunately, that also might be the key to the whole thing’s undoing. This might work just fine on a small scale with lesser known companies, but once the bigger players get hold of it, what happens? The next time one of those corporations isn’t trying to take all of the money for itself will be the first, and nobody on the other side is going to stand for that if they can avoid it. And once that happens, yet again we’re right back where we started.

23andEverybody

I’ve said before that I don’t understand the home DNA testing craze. Why would I, a sane person, voluntarily hork the very thing that makes me me (or to put it another way, the most personal piece of personal data I have) into a tube and mail it off to a corporation that’s going to do lord knows what with it? To my mind, that’s an extremely dumb thing to do. A lot of companies can’t seem to handle something as simple as your email address correctly, so why would you trust them with this? It’s your fucking DNA! And you’re making it publicly available! On purpose! Yeah, maybe finding out things you already know about where your grandma came from sounds fun, but what happens after that? What if, for example, that profile you sent to the publicly accessible database fell into the hands of an insurance company that was looking for a way to deny you coverage or make you pay more for it? Or what if, guilty or not, you wound up entangled in a police investigation? Finding out that you’re 98 percent Eastern European but you might be Asian too because you ate a grain of rice one time doesn’t sound quite as worth it now, does it?

But even though I fully intend to do my part to avoid having any of that happen to me, it may not matter. If an idiot or three in my family decides to waste his money, I’m as good as identifiable. If you don’t believe me, just ask the Golden State Killer. Yes, this one guy deserved it. But that doesn’t mean that everyone else is going to or that any of this is ok.

Even though the killer left his DNA at multiple crime scenes, investigators couldn’t find him until they turned to a massive genealogical website called GEDmatch. Users can upload their genetic profiles to GEDmatch — and websites like it — to learn about their family trees and look for long-lost relatives.
Investigators discovered that they could also use GEDmatch to look for a killer. They uploaded a fake genetic profile using crime scene DNA and found matches, not of the killer himself, but of his relative. From there, they could hunt through the family tree to find a suspect who had been in the right place at the right time. This is called a long-range familial DNA search, and it raises all sorts of questions about ethics, consent, and just how far law enforcement can go in their pursuit of a killer.