Since I’m all about helping you guys out whenever possible, I thought I would pass on a link to something that I’m sure at one time or another we all wish we had. Hell, maybe some of you could use it at this very moment. So if you’re looking to get rid of that pesky significant other in your life, why not click on over to
The Breakup Letter Generator
and have it take care of them for you. All you have to do is answer a few questions about yourself and the bastard you’re kickin to the curb and the program will provide you with the perfect kissoff note.
As an example, let’s just say that Matt and I were together and I was wanting to break up with him. The letter might go something like this.
Writing this letter is painful, but necessary. By now, you might have noticed that I have left, and I’m not coming back. Don’t feel responsible. We just
weren’t right for one another. Besides, my history of bed wetting prevents me from committing to a serious relationship and you deserve better.
You deserve someone who appreciates all of your special qualities, especially the obnoxious way you scarf down two pints of Ben and Jerry’s while watching
Friends. Even though we’re no longer together, we’ll always have our memories. I’ll never forget the time you made me lie about my religion to your parents.
They say that time heals all wounds, and I hope that soon, you will be able to speak coherently to a person of the opposite gender. When this time comes,
I hope we will be living in different state institutions.