Things I’ve Been Thinking About

I don’t understand sports fans who riot when their team wins. What sense does that make? When they lose that’s different, I can almost see where they’re coming from there. Although, any adult who’s not a part of the losing team but still takes things that seriously probably has some separate issues of his own that he should look into. But forget about that, for our purposes here it makes some sense that emotions would run high for fans watching their team’s quest for the championship come to a negative end and it also makes sense, knowing that some people are prone to act out with raw emotion when that happens, that riots are possible. You’re frustrated, you’re angry, you’re sad, you’re a whole range of emotions and sometimes that can be hard to handle so it’s not impossible to think that somebody could say to a group of people, “I’m so fucking mad right now that I’m going to turn over a few cars, set some stuff on fire and maybe loot a few buildings. Who’s with me?” But when you win, it’s a celebration! Things went your way! You’re happy, you’re excited, you’re pleased, you’re a whole range of emotions and given that those emotions are different, it doesn’t make all that much sense to think that a guy could say to a group of people, “I’m so happy right now that I’m going to go out and turn over a few cars, set some stuff on fire and maybe loot a few buildings because I’m proud of my city and my team. Who’s with me?”

Am I the only one who finds it ironic not to mention highly amusing when I hear that organizations for the blind are holding focus groups?

The expression “odd jobs” bothers me. I think it’s because of the way people use it to describe ordinary things. Cutting your lawn or shoveling your driveway aren’t odd jobs because everybody does that. You see it all the time. Getting paid to sort dryer lint into coloured piles on the other hand, that’s an odd job.

I got myself one of those Ikea credit cards a little while ago, but I can’t figure out how to put it together.

I saw a report on the news a while ago that talked about a new school in California exclusively for overweight kids. Hold on, that’s not the joke. In addition to teaching students all of the usual skills such as reading and writing, they will also learn how to count calories at meal times as well as take walks every morning. No, that’s not the joke either. During the report a guy came on and said that the school would be a positive environment for students because they wouldn’t have to worry about being made fun of. Ok, whatever. There are a couple of ways we can look at this. First, allow me to play the voice of experience for a second, and not because I’m fat. I spent pretty much all of my elementary and high school life in a school for blind people. And while we may not have spent a lot of time making fun of each other for being blind [and that’s not to say that we didn’t spend any time on that], we quickly found other reasons to insult each other. It’s human nature. Put a bunch of people with commonalities together and they’ll turn on one another anyway by exploiting each other’s differences. But the ribbing they’ll get from each other will be nothing compared to what they’ll get from the kids who go to the regular schools once they figure out that Jimmy from down the street goes to Fat Fuck High, which will happen around the same time as they see him getting on the school bus with the forklift on the front of it. And if anybody has a problem with that joke and wants to beat the hell out of me, catch me, fat ass, catch me.

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