Football, 1984, And Other Things That Have Nothing In Common

Happy Wednesday to all. Wow, what a beautiful day it is outside today. Actually, what a beautiful week this has been. Possibly the nicest week we’ve had all Summer when I stop and think about it. Not too hot, not too humid, sunny, clear, breezy, it’s just about as perfect as weather can get. If we could live like this all year round and lose the fucking snow I’d be a happy guy…at least most of the time. Maybe I should rephrase that before anybody gets the wrong idea. I’m honestly one of the happiest people I know, it’s just that sometimes it doesn’t come across in the things I write. I can’t believe I’m actually sitting here justifying myself to a bunch of invisible people, I’m such a retard. But getting back to my point, if you’re reading this from someplace where the weather is identical or similar to the stuff I’m describing, be sure to get out and enjoy it as much as you can. I’ve been doing my best to do that, because I know that in a few short months it’ll be gone and we’ll be ass deep in snow and everything will be freezing. Ug, I hate Winter. Christmas, my Birthday, all that cool stuff, it’s all balanced out by Winter and the complete and total suckiness that it brings with it. Wow, what a downer this paragraph turned out to be. Let’s try another one and hope it goes a little better.

I read something on
Boing Boing
today that amused me. It seems that a group calling itself
The Ministry of Reshelving
has started a campaign to put copies of George Orwell’s book 1984 into more appropriate sections of bookstores. They’re even encouraging people to get involved and help out the cause. If it sounds like something you can see yourself getting involved in, here’s what you need to do, taken straight from the Ministry’s rule set:

1. Select a local bookstore to carry out your reshelving activities.

2. Download and print “This book has been relocated by the Ministry of Reshelving bookmarks and “All copies of 1984 have been relocated” notecards to take with you to the bookstore. Or make your own. We recommend bringing a notecard and 5-10 bookmarks to each store.

3. Go to the bookstore and locate its copies of George Orwell’s 1984. Unless the Ministry of Reshelving has already visited this bookstore, it is probably currently incorrectly classified as “Fiction” or “Literature.”

4. Discreetly move all copies of 1984 to a more suitable section, such as “Current Events”, “Politics”, “History”, “True Crime”, or “New Non-Fiction.”

5. Insert a Ministry of Reshelving bookmark into each copy of any book you have moved. Leave a notecard in the empty space the books once occupied.

6. If you spot other incorrectly classified books, feel free to relocate them.

7. Please report all reshelving efforts to the Ministry. Email your store name, location, # of 1984 copies reshelved, and any other reshelving activities conducted, to reshelving @ avantgame.com. Photos of your mission can be uploaded to Flickr, tagged as “reshelving”, and submitted to the Ministry of Reshelving group.

You know, that sounds like fun.

Speaking of fun, if you don’t generally stay home on Saturday nights to watch CFL football games on CBC, you might want to consider it this week. As you’re probably aware, the CBC is in the middle of a huge lockout, the result of which is that pretty much anybody who has anything to do with the execution of the network’s programming is off the job right now. Everybody from newscasters to camera people are unable to work, which leaves management in charge of running the show. for the most part they’ve taken the easy way out, using the BBC’s news instead of their own and showing documentaries and the like in place of new programming. But not everything is going to be that simple, and that’s where football comes in.

CBC’s management promised when the lockout began that their CFL coverage would not be disrupted and that no matter what they had to do, Saturday’s game would be presented in a professional manner. To put it simply, CBC was all like “we’ll just show the game without play by play and we’ll do the best we can to make sure that the camera work doesn’t suck too much.” But then the CFL was all like “nuh-uh. No commentary, no game.” So what we’re left with now are office workers pretending to be cameramen while other office workers pretend that they belong behind a microphone for any reason. I imagine that it could quite possibly look more than a little bit like
this,
which I’m honestly sort of hoping it does.

Well, this post is getting long and I’m getting hungry, so that’s all for now. So until we meet again, enjoy yourselves and never forget that Dr. Phil is a total douchebag. Thank you and good day.

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