They’re Back! And Some Other Crap

After being gone for I can’t even remember how long, the Salty Ham Pay-per-view Roundtables have returned! This is surely a direct result of my overwhelming clout and worldwide internet influence, though some may try to tell you that it has everything to do with somebody offering to take the time to put them together each month because we felt like doing them again. But I want you, the loyal Vomiteers, to know that those people are…well, they’re right actually. but in any event, they’re back, and this makes me happy. If it makes you happy too, then I encourage you to click
and check out our picks for Judgment Day.

And to answer the 2 most common questions we get about these things, yes we’re keeping score and yes you can participate. Click above for all the details.

In completely unrelated news, it’s looking a lot like
the fucking apartment hunt
will soon be over, which makes me happier than any of you will ever understand. Ok so I’m sure Carin understands, but she knows me well and she’s quite familiar with my legendary hatred for all things moving and moving related, so she doesn’t count.

I can’t believe how hard this whole thing has been, but I guess that’s Guelph for ya. this city has changed a lot in the 5 or so years I’ve been here. When I first got here, Guelph was a place that was completely different from anywhere I’d ever lived. It had all the good things about a city, but with a kind of small town feel about it that made it a safe and fun place to be. But now it’s a city that’s trying to come to terms with the fact that it is indeed a city and yes, there are people who want to come here and take away the uniqueness and develop it into a carbon copy of every other city in the known world. And along with that, it’s also a place that’s inheriting the shitty parts of city life, like drugs and the crime that comes along with them. It’s a really sad thing to watch happen, and it’s made even worse by the fact that Guelph, as it is now, isn’t anywhere near capable of handling it, which brings me back to the apartment hunt.

Guelph seems to be made up of 3 basic types of rental property. There’s the cheap and central, the way out of our price range and central, and the stuff that would be fantastic were it not located at the corner of Middle Of Nowhere Drive and Am I Still even In Town At This Point Avenue.

Right about now you might be wondering why, if our only good option looks like cheap and central, has this whole thing been so friggin difficult? that’s a fair question. But the thing about the cheap stuff is that it’s cheap because it has to be, and the pricey stuff is pricey because it needs to be in order to avoid becoming cheap stuff in the future, even though by being pricey it ensures that good people who don’t happen to have much money can’t live there, but I digress. Remember the drugs and crime I talked about earlier? The cheap stuff is where they live, hence that’s not where we live, at least not if we can help it.

So it’s at this point that we need to start creating smaller sub-categories. I’ve started breaking the cheap stuff down like this. There’s ok but creepy, wow, what a dump, wow, what a fucking dump, did they build a criminal warehouse here and not tell us, and good God, you’re telling me peiple actually live here?

So with all of that and the occasional closed-minded prick who won’t rent to us because blind people can’t do their own yard work working against us, things get pretty difficult pretty quick, and it winds up taking a long time to find that ever so elusive 4th type of building, one I think I’ll start calling the miracle building.

The miracle building is generally the one they don’t advertize so the nare-do-wells won’t find it. The one that you have to stumble upon by chance and generally can only get into if somebody puts in a good word for you. the one where they keep the price reasonable to keep people happy so they won’t leave and will instead tell their friends that they should come and live there too. I think that finally we might have found one of those. I’m sure that one of us will keep you posted. Wish us luck, we need it.

Ok, this is getting long, so I’ll go now. It’s almost time to look at the miracle building anyway. But before I leave I would just like to say that being awake since 4:30 this morning even though I only managed to sleep for a little under 4 hours can bite my ass. thank you and good day.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.