>What Resides in my creepy mind?

>I woke up this morning quite disturbed by a dream I had. I dreamed I was at a banquet. There was tea and coffee and soft piano music and people clinking glasses and eating little squares. You could hear the murmur of people talking. Then I found my way to my table. There were administrators of various organizations, I can’t remember what they all did, or why I was shmoozing with them. But then one of them talked about the human rights work they were doing. They said they were trying to help people who were, for one reason or another, political prisoners in foreign prisons. They said that as they sat nibbling on desserts, they were awaiting a page with news about one particular prisoner in a Chinese labour camp. Apparently the prison officials were going to make him have a brain operation that would render him incapable of communicating with the outside world to tell anyone what was done to him, but would still leave him physically capable of doing manual labour until the end of his sentence. The human rights people were trying to stop this, using all legal means they could, but it was a slow process and what could they do, being so far away? For all they knew, the operation could have already been done. Then the dream just ended and I woke up going, “What in the sweet holy christ was that?” It sort of reminded me of how it felt whenever they would talk about the whole William Sampson thing when he was being held in Saudi Arabia. I don’t know. The whole atmosphere was very weird. So happy, even though everyone seemed to be there for very sad reasons.

I had another dream a couple years ago that the government had figured out that the best way to find out important secrets that people had was to always have their agents in crowds. They even created opportunities for crowds to form, like big celebrations and events. Then, they would simply disperse agents throughout the crowd whose sole purpose was to listen in on conversations. They had figured out that people talked more in crowds because they falsely believed that it was impossible for people around them to hear what they were saying. Then the event would end, the crowd would disperse, and guess who would disappear from their home that night?

The weird part about that dream is I can see some truth to it. Not the government part, although with all the listening in on phone calls and such, I guess it’s not impossible, but the false sense of security people have about crowds. I’ve been in crowded buses and heard people’s stories about an abusive boyfriend, someone having AIDS, stuff about drugs, stuff about putting laxatives in some brownies and giving them to someone, stuff that probably shouldn’t be talked about openly. But they think no one will listen because everyone seems to be wrapped up in their own conversations.

The scariest part of these dreams is I have never had these thoughts consciously before I had the dreams. I can’t even begin to figure out where they came from. When I woke up from the dreams, it was as if someone else was dreaming in my head. There are some dreams you have that you understand why you had them. But these were like completely new concepts to me. What is crawling out of the recesses of my mind that I didn’t even know existed? God I sound like I’ve lost my mind. But I swear I haven’t.

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