When She Leaves the Room, Does She Have to Grease the Door?

Oh my god. I wish they’d given either the specific weight of this woman, or the dimensions of some of the narrower tunnels. Maybe I’ll have to do more research, just because I’m such a prick. I can’t even imagine being in this situation. I think it’s prickish to make fun of someone for being a wee bit chunky, but after reading this, I don’t think I’m out of line to make fun of this tubby tourist as they put it. I’m still laughing.

Overweight tourist traps tour in South African cave

A corpulent holidaymaker felt a bit of a turkey on New Year’s Day after getting stuck between rocks in a South African cave, trapping 22 tourists for over ten hours.

Staff at the Cango Caves in Western Cape had politely warned the tubby tourist that she may have difficulties in some of the tighter parts of the intricate rock formation.

“She was forewarned at the ticket office that she might have difficulty, but she and her husband insisted she should take part in the adventure,” said Hein Gerstner, manager of the tourist attraction.

He explained that the safety team eventually “used liquid paraffin to grease the surface area and a pulley to lift her” but “there was permission granted to drill or to cut rock in a worse-case scenario”.

“It would have been a last resort,” he added.

One of the tourists trapped in the “Tunnel of Love” was a diabetic, but rescuers were eventually able to climb over the trapped woman and provide them with insulin.

Are you on the floor yet? Oh, the visions! She must have been huuuuuuge to be warned at the ticket office that Gee, Ma’am, you might not fit in the caves. And can you imagine having to use liquid wax to grease the rocks and then winch her out like some kind of sunken ship? Um wow! I feel for her, because I’m sure news cameras would have been all over this. I love how they call her “corpulent” but don’t tell you exactly how “corpulent” she was. I hope she made real good friends after being stuck with these folks for 10 hours. I think next time she wants to plan a trip, Moooo-xico would be a better choice.

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