I got something in the mail yesterday that frightened me. It was a piece of mail from some Jehova’s Witnesses, or Jehova’s Witlesses as Steve called them. But I didn’t even have to open it to be frightened by it. You could tell it was not professionally put together. Someone was doing this from their …
Monthly Archives: June 2007
Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Make Shitty Movie
When people ask me why I never go to the movies and why I don’t care when stuff comes out on DVD, I always have a million ways to answer their questions. And as of this very moment, I now haveone more.Yes, “Monopoly: The Movie” could soon be coming to a theatre near you. FILM …
Tone Death
If the urge strikes you to go to the Philippines, and while you’re there, you feel the need to go to a karaoke bar and sing, make sure you *can* sing. If not, you may die. That’s what happened to a poor unfortunate soul named Romy Baligula. He was halfway through a song, I don’t …
Follow My Nose To What?
Last night, we were watching Cops. I don’t know what it is exactly, but something always draws us to watching crime shows, and I think the most amusing ones are Cops and To Serve and Protect, just because the people getting arrested come up with some pretty weird excuses for why they have drugs on …
You Have A Collect Call From…Your Cheap Offspring.
Isn’t this a sad statement? According to snopes, Father’s Day is the busiest day of the year for collect calls. Next in line is Mother’s Day, followed by Valentine’s day. Aren’t we a classy bunch? We can’t even pay a few bucks to say we love our parents and significant others. Tomorrow’s Father’s day, and …
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Beating A Who With A What Now?
Steve told me about this story, and he’s right. The next passage contains the best words to be written down since a police officer said someone was punching vegetation. Durango, CO11:08 a.m. A man on Westwood Place said his girlfriend was beating a miniature Chihuahua with a spatula. And that’s the whole story. That leaves …
We Had the Hot Seat, Now You Can Have A Cool Seat.
First we had the USB missile launcher. Then came the USB nuclear missile launcher. Then we got less warlike in our USB gadgets with the creation of the secret base emergency button, and finally, our laziness was shown with the invention of the USB ash tray. But now, we have something for the What the …
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Homeboy Got a New Cellphone!
I know, I know, that was only funny for Steve, the lady at Rogers who I talked to when I got this thing, and me, but that’s never stopped me before, hahah. Remember when I jumped up and down about Rogers’s new phone that you could buy with the Talks software already installed? Well, guess …
Oh, My, God!
This is a truly amazing video.A guy walks around asking people simple questions like when and where did the 9/11 attacks take place. if you’ve ever seen those Talking To Americans bits on the CBC, you probably know what happens next. Seriously, watch this thing and wonder along with me how it is that some …
>I Think Somebody’s A Little Squirrely
>Are squirrels super valuable in Israel? If not, do any of you have another way to explainthis?I hope so, because I’ve got nothin’, at least nothin’ better than mental illness. The victim, whose name was not released, said he was carrying his pet squirrel in his fanny pack when Surami grabbed it and tried to …
