I’ve got a few random wrestling thoughts floating around in my head, so I thought I’d better write them down before they’re out of date or I forget about them like 3 quarters of what happens on TNA. If you’re not a wrestling person, feel free to skip this post, there’s nothing for you to see here.
I wonder how many of you actually stuck around after I warned that there was a wrestling post ahead. I suspect not a lot, at least not if the search stats here on the site and my own personal experience mean anything at all. I’m starting to think that out of my circle of wrestling watching friends and acquaintances, I’m pretty much the last man standing. The last time I can remember spending any length of time bullshitting with a buddy about wrestling was back in the summer, and most of that was talking about how much we liked UFC and how much better their shows have been than WWE’s. Before that I spent a weekend catching another friend up on current happenings because he was visiting for a few days and we decided to order SummerSlam. The guy couldn’t remember the last time he watched any wrestling at all, and he used to be a huge fan, one of those people who tried not to miss anything. Since that time, other than a few short conversations with an uncle and watching
with a bunch of people who weren’t really fans, there’s been nothing. No what’d you think of the show emails, no should I get a replay, and not even any what’s your take on the latest big news story? I’m not saying that wrestling is in danger of dying off anytime soon, but when you’re driving away your biggest fans and not holding even casual interest, something is definitely in need of fixing before it does.
One of the things in need of fixing is the quantity and quality of pay-per-view events out there. WWE alone has 2 this month, each weighing in at a hefty $40. Other than the most hardcore fans and people who cover the business for a living, who is going to drop that much coin on shows that with very few exceptions are no better than what you can see every week for free? Cyber Sunday is a good example of that. It had the voting for matches and stipulations hook so more people may have watched it, but other than Undertaker Batista and Triple H Umaga, everything else was about average and nothing I’d ever need to see again. By the time next year’s version comes around I doubt I’ll remember anything about this one, and when your goal is to have me spend money, like the show and then decide to spend money again in the future, this is bad.
Just when I think TNA can’t get any more ridiculous, they go out and top themselves. I’m not even talking about the current world title situation, you know, the one that revealed, at least in the context of storylines, that TNA Management doesn’t watch their own show. Then again, who could blame them? No, I’m talking about the
Junior Fatu/Robert Roode
As I figured would happen, Fatu beat old Whatshisname to advance in the tournament. If that was the worst of it, I could have written it off as another in the long line of stupid fucking things done by this stupid fucking company. But oh no, this is TNA, always ready to go above and beyond. Later in the week, reports come out that Junior has left the company over money issues. You realize what this means don’t you? TNA, brain surgeons that they are, had been giving a main event level push to a guy that they not only didn’t have under contract, but hadn’t even finished negotiating with. rgJMP:jm'[aiREHJQEKL;RHA;DHLKJASDHFLASKDHF! That, in case you were wondering, was me bashing myself repeatedly in the head with my keyboard.
So with Fatu now out of the picture, it falls to TNA to explain why he isn’t around anymore and to slide somebody into his vacated tournament spot. So what do they do? Do they give Robert Roode his spot back? Do they give Christian, who wasn’t even a participant when it started but won his way this far a buy to the finals? No. They put Chris Harris, who wasn’t even in the original brackets, into a match against Christian because, and I wish I was making this up, he was so close to making it during the qualifying. a;slskdhfqw[oiur9p84p987523409kljasdghkljadhgalkjtgertgqlkglalksjdfhkljahdfklk;ajsdnv
As for why Junior wasn’t there? The best that TNA could come up with was, and I quote, “unknown reasons.” Unknown reasons? You mean you don’t even know why he left? I guess that makes sense since management doesn’t have a clue what’s going on either in real life or on the show, but come on. How hard would it have been to say that he suffered an injury in training, was unable to compete and was giving up his spot? I came up with that idea in 10 seconds, and TNA, with days worth of warning, could only pull out unknown reasons? That explains a lot. Also makes the company look real good, doesn’t it? “Gee, we don’t know why this guy left in the middle of a world title tournament.” Idiots.
And speaking of idiots, WWE is now making the names of people suspended for failing Wellness tests public, and the first 2 names came out last week. Chris Masters is out for 60 days which means that this is his second violation, and Harry [D.H.] Smith, who just started to appear on TV, is out for 30. the Smith case is sad, because of all the people you’d think wouldn’t be failing tests, he’s the guy. I don’t know what he tested positive for, but what I do know is that in 2002, his father DaveyBoy Smith, also a wrestler, died, and drug use was a major factor. Hopefully Harry is smart enough not to take the same road, but I’ve given people in wrestling too much credit before, so I’m not holding my breath.
That’s all for now. If any wrestling fans still read this thing, feel free to drop a comment or an email. It’d be nice to know a few of you still exist.