Maybe They Should Steal Some Brains

Attention car thieves: If you’re stealing a car to get to your anti-car theft counselling sessions, it’s time to go to jail, boys. I don’t understand why these kids were getting counselling if they’re the worst offenders in the car theft department you can find. And that story about it being too cold to walk? Give me a break. But in case they didn’t know, here’s a message for them. You know there are these numbers you can call where you can ask someone to come and pick you up and take you somewhere. They’re called taxi services. Use one. Oh, you knew about that? I thought so.

I still can’t believe that some people are considered so high-risk that they are called once every 3 hours to make sure they’re not stealing cars. Is this all day and all night? If so, I hope they live alone, because I wouldn’t want to be awakened in the night for the check-in call. Ok, if you need to check on them every three hours, lock them up!

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