How Much Is That Doggie In The OH MY DEAR GOD!!!

City government in Amsterdam has announced plans to allow both gay and straight couples to have sex in public at a place called the Vondelpark, which hosts over 10 million visitors each year.

The plan has caused the outrage you would expect, but rather than coming from so-called morality crusaders like it would around here, the city council is catching heat from
dog owners who are upset that another part of the legislation will outlaw unleashed dogs in the same area.

“As long as the park has existed, we’ve been allowed to let our dogs run freely,” said one angry area resident. “It’s outrageous that we will be punished from now on but public sex won’t.”

Two things:
1. You live in Amsterdam, a place where sex and drugs are part of your average Tuesday. Public sex is a logical step, and I’m surprised legalizing it in this particular spot took this long or was even necessary to begin with.
2. Which of the following has more of a tendency to tear a person in half?
A. Two people fucking
or
B. An unleashed dog.

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Oh, and before anybody asks, I have no idea if there is any truth to the rumour that the offending area will be renamed the Fondlepark.

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