The 30 Dumbest Videogame Titles Ever

Last Updated on: 7th August 2022, 08:44 am

I don’t play a lot of videogames, but I do know funny when I see it, and this is pretty funny.

Spanky’s Quest
Super Nintendo – 1991

Premise: Spanky is a monkey with balls. Throwing these balls is his way of attacking enemies, and at the end of each level there’s a boss. All very traditional, all very entertaining.

But come on! Spanky the monkey? Japanese developer Natsume — most famous now for its Harvest Moon titles — was either disastrously fond of Western euphemisms, or simply terrible at picking innocent game names. Would you pick Spanky the monkey off the shelf for your kids?  

Touch Dic
Nintendo DS – 2005

Premise: More a tool than a game, Touch Dic is a dictionary and translation title for the Nintendo DS, using the console’s touch-happy stylus.

We want to say this is a game-naming FAIL, but we just can’t. It’s from Korea and is now on the shelves as Touch Dictionary. But we’ll never forget the day our pals at GameSpot first told us there was a game called Touch Dic… happy, happy times.

How To Be A Complete Bastard
ZX Spectrum, Commodore 64, Amstrad CPC – 1987

Premise: Invade a party for rich folks and demonstrate your boyish skills of being a complete and utter git, by for example loosening the screws on the handles of the disabled toilet.

This wonderfully tasteless game was always for the Bart Simpsons of the world. Nothing similar has ever really been made since this game was released — if it were, the combined uproar from Fox News and the Daily Mail would wipe out life on Earth. A classic retro game to check out if you ever get chance.

Somebody please tell me you’ve played a few of these.

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