You have my deepest sympathies. And remember, when the day comes that you’ve had enough and finally snap, it wasn’t me who decided that your idiot parents should be allowed to name you something stupid like Budweiser. The guy you want to lay the beating on is Lars Tegenfeldt, and you might want to consider going after the people he works for down at the Tax authority. Just listen to what he said before you were born.
“There is nothing negative about a name like Coca-Cola or McDonald’s.”
Easy for him to say. Nobody teases guys named Lars Tegenfeldt just because they’re named Lars Tegenfeldt. They have to be geeks or wet their pants or make bad decisions about what people can call you first.