>Dog Pile

>As promised, here comes the dog stuff.

Man, I’ve had a lot of funny little kid stories to do with Trixie. There’s this baby that barks at us as we approach. At first I thought it was a real dog, but then I realized it was a kid in a stroller! Man, I had a good giggle.

Another kid consistently calls her “work doggy”. As we pass, I always here, “Hello, work doggy.”

I think that’s the same kid who surprised me with a strange question one day. As Trixie and I were walking down the driveway, The kid spoke up and said, “Excuse me. Is your dog still a little wacky?” I had to think for a second, and managed to remember one day when Trixie may have tried to sniff her in a doorway and I might have said, “Sorry about that, Trixie’s being a little wacky.” That kid is always taking notes on everything around her. I wonder if she’ll end up being a reporter or something.

Some kids are trained better than the parents. I keep forgetting to write this down, but I was in the mall a few months ago, and as I walked past a family, a kid who sounded like he was barely old enough to talk yelled, “working doggy! don’t touch!” I turned around and said that was one smart kid. The other day, another one actually walked up to me, and politely asked, “Can I please pet your dog?” When he put it that way, I couldn’t say no. I took off the harness and let kid and dog have a meet and greet. I thanked him for being so nice about it.

Now, I just have to get those darling little kids to train some rude assholes that pass for grown-ups. there was one sharing the elevator with me, and he bitterly said, “So we can’t touch her, eh?” I said I only let people pet her when she’s out of harness. I was about to say that I could walk outside and take the harness off and let him pet her if he wanted, but he changed my mind by barking back, “so…we can pet her only while she’s taking a dump?” With an attitude like that, Mister, you won’t even get to pet her then.

I noticed the other day that she’s figured out that the word “doggy!” might have to do with her. As we were walking, some kids yelled, “Doggy!” Zoom! The head looked over in their direction. I told her to never mind and she was fine, but I’m sure she’s learned that doggy means her.

She also responds to something else weird, she knows what Johnny Slow Lane means. Long story. The other day, Trixie tried to take a long and involved sniff of the kitchen floor. She tried to make like she was just passin’ through the kitchen towards the balcony or some other good place to hang out, but I said if she was just passing through, she was in the slow lane. Then for some reason, the next time she did it, Steve said “Hey Johnny Slow Lane!” Zoom! She came out of the kitchen in a hurry. God damn, this dog is smart.

I think Trixie should have been a male because she doesn’t like to shop. Every time we go in a big store, she always wants to find the exit as fast as possible. Once, after I found what I wanted and had to go pay for it, she tried to make for the exit! Are you trying to turn me into a shoplifter and make yourself into my getaway vehicle?

Some people try to praise my dog for me. It’s hilarious. Once, we were walking and Trixie stopped at a driveway because someone was coming out of it. As the car drove by, through the open window, I swear I heard a man say, “Good boy!” That cracked me up.

A while ago, in another post, I mentioned the trouble I had with family members and the dog. I forgot one thing. When I had just brought Trixie home, my dad hadn’t quite got the idea that you don’t ask permission to bring the dog into public places. You just don’t. We drove up to a fancy restaurant, and dad went in first to see if we had to wait or something, and then I heard that he asked if the dog could come in. I had to explain to him that they don’t have the right to deny the dog access, and asking permission gives them the false impression that they can say no. He did learn pretty fast, I have to give him credit.

I mentioned my most successful Trixie-bathing experience in a comment thread the other day, but it was so awesome that I thought it deserved a spot in a post. Believe it or not, I’ve only had to bathe Trix three times since I got her. I guess because her hair is so short, she doesn’t get smelly real quick, and after the switch away from Eukanuba, I feel I can go even longer. Anyway, I was pretty prowd of her first bath, but had my confidence shaken by the second bath. First of all, I had to fight tooth and nail to get her in the tub. Second, she kept jumping out. There was water every frickin where! Oh I was so frustrated and tired by the end, and Steve was laughing and saying that was more his image of what bathing a dog was like. I was defeated.

This time, I got prepared. I got a little suction cup thingamabob with a string thing on it that I could attach her collar to, so in theory, it would keep her from jumping out. The suction cup didn’t work really well,but it gave me something else to grab other than a slippery dog. But I think the most important thing I did was listen to that little dog voice. It said, “You’ve been going too fast! You scare me! Slow down!” So I did. I took my sweet time. I just had her sit for a while in the tub and I talked to her and stuff. I went really slowly, and she hardly riggled at all. She tolerated everything with so little fighting that there was hardly any water anywhere. Now, was that really so hard? Why couldn’t I get the signals before? Why did I have to move so fast? I guess I heard she liked showers, so I didn’t think I had to go slow . But maybe my tub is different than the shower she was used to.

It’s official, I have a cool dog. But I knew this before. I dropped a quarter a few days ago. I looked and looked and looked, but I couldn’t find it! I knew it was near my bed or Trixie’s bed. I was starting to worry that Trixie had chewed on it or something stupid. Nope. When I finally found it, it lay untouched right next to her bed. How awesome is that?

Trixie does something really weird. If one of us is sicker than usual and needs to lie down for a while, she keeps coming over to the sick one and licking them. It’s not just a passing slurp. It’s big licks! She has to be told to stop! She bugged the hell out of Steve the other day when he had a migraine! What is she trying to do, heal him with her tongue?

And that’s about it. I hope this stuff isn’t too boring.

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