There are two random posts coming: one non-dog, and one dog. Isn’t that scary? I have enough drivel to categorize it. Hmmm. Maybe it’s not as random as I thought. Let’s start with the non-dog stuff.
For some unknown reason, I was thinking about that Raffi song “Oats and beans and Barley” (sorry, the song isn’t complete) and noticed something. He’s trying to tell kids how stuff grows. He mentions planting seeds, and then he mentions the sun, but he never mentions the rain. Last time I checked, oats and beans and barley would kinda shrivel up and die if they didn’t get any rain. Oh here I go again, ripping apart Kids’ songs.
I should have put this one in my Raffi post, but somehow it got forgotten. I remember when I was a kid and listened to “Walk, Walk, Walk” and thinking, “why does Raffi go to school?” I was so confused. “Does he teach there? Does he walk his kids? I’d never seen a big man at school unless he was teaching or cleaning or something.” God I was a weird kid. But I did notice that Raffi liked orange juice. The things you remember.
While I’m still gabbling about being a kid, I have to ask this question. Have hot-air balloons gotten better? If not, how the hell can that be called romantic? When I was about 4, I heard about the joy of floating in a hot-air balloon. It was such a fun ride, and you floated along. That’s what I heard. So, being a little kid, I wanted to do that. As luck would have it, we won a hot-air balloon ride. I was so excited the day we were going to go flying in a big balloon. The first day we tried, the wind was too strong. So, we came back another day. I was excited all over again. Finally, after all the waiting, we were in the basket. AS we went up, there was this horrible roaring over my head! I couldn’t hear anything but that roaring. Every time someone tried to speak, it would go off again. I thought maybe this would happen until we were up, and then it would stop, but it never did. I hardly felt any movement. Mosquitos made meals of my legs as this hot thing roared right above my head. Eventually I got kind of scared and our ride was brought to an early end, but what a disappointment! There was no floating, there was no piece, just this hot thing roaring over my head. Nobody could talk. How can that be enjoyable by any stretch of the imagination?
Here’s the dumbest invention ever. Why are there bags without handles? I mean, I understand garbage bags not having handles, but why are there such things in a store? Why would such a thing have a reason to exist? I always thought when I put something in a bag at a store, it’s because I didn’t want to hold it in my hands. If I don’t want to hold it in my hands, I would want to put it on my arm or something? So, why would I choose a bag with no handles? AT that point, I might as well hold the items in my hands.
I had this brought to my attention when I went to buy more vacuum bags. I bought a couple of packages of them, and the dude just sort of handed them to me. I really didn’t feel like holding them in my only free hand, so I asked for a bag. I even said why I wanted a bag. What did he do? He went to get me one, and came back and gave me one without handles! So now, instead of holding 2 things, I’m holding 1, but it’s still occupying my free hand. I eventually shoved the bag in my pocket, but it really made me wonder why such bags are even made.
What is with news reporters pronouncing Beijing funny these days? Before the olympics, they would just say Beijing. Now, they say it like Bay Jing. It’s like they say the j like you do when you say “juice”. What’s up with that? Is that the new pronunciation? At first, I laughed it off as one idiot reporter who might also tell us to check the addict for ass-pest-tose, but it was showing up everywhere. Is there a reason? If it’s the new pronunciation, personally I think it sounds ugly.
The last thing that’s been floating around my head is a frustration with companies who buy up a whole bunch of phone numbers that they think will be cute and easy to remember. Rogers and AOL spring to mind. Goddamn it, all the numbers just go back to the main number, so why not stick to one number that I can remember instead of confusing the hell out of me?
And that’s about it for the non-dog stuff. You just wait until I break out the doggy things. Now that, that’s a thought pile.