I’m not so sure that this would be my first line of defense if I werethis guy, but hey, I guess you’ve gotta do whatever you think’s gonna get you off…so to speak.
A Texas doctor on trial for indecent exposure claimed that he couldn’t be guilty of flashing an undercover cop because, well, there would be no point in doing so when you’ve only got a 2.8 inch penis that nobody would be able to see. The argument failed and he was found guilty, but there’s no word on whether he’ll be spending any time in the pokey. Come on, you would have made that joke too and you know it. And yes, the fact that the man’s lawyers were named Dick and Neal is duely noted.
So now it’s time to take an informal 2.8 inch poll. What’s worse: being found guilty and having a flashing conviction on your public record, or having it be known as a matter of public record that you have admitted to needing a microscope every time you need to take a piss? I think I’m leaning towards being guilty because that kind of thing can really mess up your life, but on the other hand I’m sure the jokes and stares would get old really fast.