And we thought Jonathan G. Parker was dumb. Just have a look at Stephan Crane. He got a little boozed up, and decided to go visit his sister. But he couldn’t get in. After trying to come in through her window, he spied a copy of the Ravalli Republic in the hall outside her apartment, and decided it would be fun to break in there since the newsroom was in the building next door. Plus, they might have something he could use to pick his sister’s lock. Uh-huh. Sis, you have quite the brother there.
He came in through a window, and watched some porn on a couple of computers. Then, he logged into both his MySpace and Facebook pages. After sobering up, he realized that was dumb.
But that wasn’t all. For no discernable reason, he picked up a couple of giant bags of Trail Mix and threw them out the window in the general direction of his sister’s apartment building. Then he took the M&Ms, and they somehow ended up on top of that same copy of the paper that spurred him to break into the place.
In a final move of incomprehensible stupidity, he sprayed the newsroom with a fire extinguisher because he thought it would be cool. Then he left.
You know what I think is funny? He admits that logging into Facebook and MySpace was dumb, but says nothing about trying to break into his sister’s apartment, heaving candy out a window, or spraying the newsroom with a fire extinguisher. What does that say?