It’s Time For Another Overly Exciting Edition Of Things Not To Do

Today’s tip: Do not under any circumstances everplay a little game of grab ass with the police officer who has been interrogating you about sex crimes, even if all you’re trying to do is “commend her for shaking her rear end so nicely.”This will never end well, unless your idea of ending well involves sexual molestation charges.

The man was being escorted to his detention cell by two female officers, and while the three were waiting for the cell door to open, the 48-year-old suddenly reach out and grabbed a hold of one of the officer’s buttocks.

“He grabbed me with a rather large hand and managed to grab the whole cheek. I felt violated and dirty,” the police woman said in court when describing the incident.

The 48-year-old, who hails from Lithuania, then shocked the courtroom further by explaining that he was justified in reaching out to the female officer because she had been giving him long stares and that felt he had sort of gone a date with her during their police car ride to the station and during the interrogation, according to the newspaper.

He then added that he had no intention of having sex with the officer, but merely wanted to compliment her with a pat on the rump “like you do in Lithuania where the women are quite pleased by such gestures”.

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