Strange Noises In The Dark, Strange Songs On The Album

Well, I have yet another Austin Lounge Lizards album to review. I went to their site, and woohoo, you can at least see the flash buttons now. So you can stop the music so you can read their stuff! Awesome! So, since “Strange Noises in the Dark” always greeted me before I could shut off the music, I decided to buy that album…and…um…what an odd album! It was put out between “The Drugs I Need” and “Never an Adult Moment” so that gives you a timeframe. I think some of the songs would be funnier if I knew the backstory. Some of them were funny anyway. So let’s go.

Strange Noises in the Dark
I would always get this damn song stuck in my head. It’s pretty simple. He and his girlfriend broke up, but she still lives close by, and he keeps hearing strange noises in the dark from her apartment and it’s slowly driving him mad. The tango sound to it cracked me up.

We Always Fight When We Drink Gin
Funny. When there’s a drink I have that has gin in it, I say stupid things like “Whatdya suppose they put in this gin?” But I’ve never thought about fighting. But if this couple gets into the gin, hide the shotguns!

Susie Rosen’s Nose
Um ok then. Some Jewish girl who once had a huge nose got a nose job and now her Jewish friends are all upset because she doesn’t look Jewish enough anymore. Er something.

You Can Eat Dog Food
Ann sent me this summary of Rush Limbaugh telling poor kids to go dumpster-diving for food, and all I could think of was this song. It’s basically the same message. Don’t tell me you’re too poor for food, eat dog food. “Eat along with Rover, 3 times a day.”

Jesse + Phil
Um…ok? I guess the lizards think that Jesse Helms and Phil Gramm, deep down, aren’t the jerks they appear to be. In fact, they are gay and should run away together. Right then.

Merchant’s Lunch
What the? This is made worse for me by the fact that the main singer is the same guy who sang in “Rasputin’s HMO,” so the hair was already going up on my neck before I could even hear the message. But when I tried to understand it, it just made my head spin. A guy came into a gloomy restaurant in Tennessee full of miserable people and the place was gross, and a green-toothed woman told him she was the queen and he had to entertain her, and he ran away and drove as hard as he could to get the hell away from there. Am I missing something?

Tastes Like Chicken
Apparently this guy will eat anything, and it tastes like chicken to him.

The Lonely Yodler
Another what the hell moment. A girl taught him how to yodle and then left him, and he couldn’t find another girl, and was the lonely yodler. Ok then. What’s up with the line “I joined a yodling club but that was not for me,
I’m looking for one partner, they all had two or three…” Right. Um, moving on?

Why Couldn’t We Blow Up Saddam
Yup, we get the picture. I love how they have no problem talking about how he was all cool when he was invading Iran, but now, nononono! He must go! I can see this one crawling into my head.

Snopes’ Glory
This one is an instrumental. Weird. I wonder if it’s written in honour of Snopes mentioning them in that Saguaro post of theirs? But it will remain a mystery.

The Miracle Baby
Oh dear, oh dear. This is how a three-year-old boy interpreted what his dad said about the mysterious baby that arrived while he was gone. “The miracle baby was sent to mamma by heaven…” I’m sure dad was being sarcastic, but the kid took him literally.

When I’m Cleaning Windows
I was listening to this song and thinking “Gee, haven’t I heard this before?” It kept ringing a distant, distant bell. But it took Steve saying “Hey! Is that seriously that George Formby song?” Yes, yes it was, and a damn fine cover of it.

Maverick_ A Love Song
The story of a guy going from wanting to change the world to basically becoming a puppet. “When you sell your soul, get an awesome price. … Call the tune and watch me play.”

Banana Slugs! Racing Down the Field
Hmmm…if I am to believe the ID3 tags on this song, the lizards are no fans of UC-Santa Cruze. And…S u l g s? They think they’re banana slugs who can’t spell, I guess.

That brings us to the end of yet another lizards album. Wow. I’m amassing quite the lizards collection, and I have much more to go. Actually, it looks like I have 4 more albums to get, and I will have collected the whole set of CD’s anyway. There are DVD’s too, but the CD’s are what I want first.

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