The Classroom Was A Buzz Of Activity

I think Kyle Dubois should have read the story of Kirsten Taylor before he thought that attaching aligator clips to his nipples and then having someone plug him in would be a good idea. Of course, it wasn’t, and his heart stopped. Luckily, or maybe unluckily, paramedics were able to attach paddles to that same …

Betcha Can’t Get me! Oh! You Can!

Hey there unnamed 19-year-old German bank robber. If you managed to get away, and police got your age, height and method of getaway wrong, do not send taunting emails to them and two newspapers to correct them. Just lay low and chuckle to yourself. Oh, you didn’t? They traced the IP and came and scooped …

CHP Does Not Stand For Chicken, Hamburgs and Pizza!

Wow. Amazing. We’ve had people go to the wrong house while drunk, but I’ve never heard of someone mistaking a CHP station for a food store. But he was in a special state when he got out of his car and started asking a cop for a sandwich. I couldn’t do a better job than …

Our House, Is A Very Very Garbage Filled House. Storing 3 Bins Is Real Hard, When We Don’t Have A Yard, But Now We Have To Do It ‘Cause Of You

I’m not sure if Guelph city council didn’t think its cunning plan all the way through or if thisarticleomitted something, but I’m left with a few questions either way. Eliminating plastic bags from the garbage collection process is a fine idea in theory, but I’m not sure how the execution is going to work. I …

Aaaa! That’s Not Santa!

This story of a doctor’s body being found inside another man’s chimney just keeps getting weirder and weirder. So it starts out that neighbours noticed a bad smell in the neighbourhood and they didn’t know why. Then, someone who was checking on the fish at a neighbour’s house happened to notice fluids in the fireplace, …

A Little Guide Dog Ettiquet Article

Michelle sent me this little “don’t pet the guide dog you moron!” article. Good on the paper for publishing it. It’s sad that the general public needs such reminders, but they’re always welcome. This little article made me think of two things that happened to me recently. I was sitting on the bus and this …

Strangers And Holsters And Beer, Oh My!

Steve sent me this story of late-night chaos, and it would have been a pretty ordinary story, except for two things. First, our star of the show was just strollin’ down the street with a pitcher of beer in his hand. We don’t know if he bought a pitcher of beer and figured he could …

What A Douche! No, I’m Not Talking About The Product!

Good god! Whoever it was at Summer’s Eve who came up with this add that tells women basically to douche for success should be immediately fired. Hell, whoever was in charge of creating and approving and dispatching the ad should all be fired. That not one of them screamed nononononono! means they’re all really really …