>Turmel Turmoil

>Carin posted sometruly amazing videothe other night of the great John Turmel campaigning during his run for Mayor of Brantford this year. Go watch that again, I’ll wait and you’ll thank me for making you. By the way, I think “Jiu-Jitsu John’s gonna kick you in the nuts” may get my vote for line of the year. Kind of makes me wish my name was John, truth be told.

But anyhow, Brother Brad, who you’ve heard from before, lives in Brantford and actually got to meet the man in person. He was kind enough to write about the experience so that we may all live vicariously through him.

Without further delay, here’s the story.

Well Hello everyone out there in Vomitland. It’s been a while since I wrote anything for the Comet, but never fear, I’m fine.

I should have written this right after it happened but I never seemed to have time.

I had just gotten on the bus to go downtown. We stopped and a guy hurled a little cart type thing on the bus, flounced in after it, paid his fare and began shouting that he was John Turmel, he was running for mayor and he wanted to pay broke students to shovel snow and do other odd jobs for old people. He came up to me, shook my hand and gave me one of his brochures. He asked me if I liked Accordion music and I said of course I did. Who doesn’t like accordion music? He then proceeded to inform me as well as anyone else who wasn’t wearing earphones that there were four concerts a month at different old folks homes around town and anyone that wanted to go was welcome.

I think he was getting on several people’s nerves because when we got down to the bus depot the inspector came charging out of the office and told him he wasn’t aloud to solicit or do whatever it was that he was doing because it was upsetting the riders. He stated in no uncertain terms that he was not soliciting, merely informing the people that he was running for mayor. The inspector said he would have to stop or he would be banned from the buses. Finally he agreed and raced off down the platform with his little cart flinging brochures in people’s faces. I don’t know what happened after that because he got on another bus. All I heard was the inspector say, “Shit, he’s doing it again!”

I don’t know how anyone else felt about that whole thing, but I must say I consider it a great honour to shake hands with a man who has single handedly lost 60-some odd elections, been arrested for campaigning in front of a high school, threatened to kick a man in the nuts and been potentially banned from the transit system for an undetermined length of time.

Keep it up John, you’re an entertaining fellow.

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