Hey, Prison Guardin’ Boy, Put The Chip Chip Chip Bag Down, Smack! Smack!

Life in the prison system must really suck. I mean, if people can get in a fight over a bag of chips, it must be pretty miserable. Oh, I forgot to mention, the people fighting over food were…two guards! An inmate actually tried to break up their fight, and the poor guy got teeth knocked […]

Keep Your Friends Close And Your Enemas Closer

Hmmm. This is just weird. This is the story. Wish I had more details. One sunday afternoon, an unnamed man who is apparently pretty close to blind got a knock on his door. “I’m here to give you an enema,” a woman said. He had just had some intestinal surgery, so thought maybe this was […]

Pictures Of Littluns, Gave The Cops An Eye Full

Here’s the story of John M. Kohler. Someone called the cops, complaining that he was outside wacking off to kids walking by. They came and found him lying on his back on his porch. When they asked him for ID, he told them they could come in while he looked for it. I guess he […]

>Bringing A Whole New Meaning To Cybersex

>And I thought the RealTouch was nasty. Some japanese scientists have created a kissing machine. The lab, part of The University of Electro-Communications, posted a video in which a researcher demonstrates the “Kiss Transmission Device.” It’s a motorized box that looks a little like a police Breathalyzer. Talk about your moment killer. In the video, […]

You, Put Out My Lights, I Have No Hope, To Carry On…

I don’t know why I feel the need to write about this. I just read yesterday that Joseph Brooks, the one who wrote “You Light Up My Life”, committed suicide. You’d think that would be reason enough to write about it. Who stopped lighting up his life? Where was all the hope to carry on? […]

We Live Among Morons That Are Going To Be The Death Of Us

I love our apartment building. The rent is pretty good. We’ve got a nice balcony. There’s a full laundry room with brand new machines and dryers that actually work. There’s a party room we can book if we need lots of space. We’ve got a swimming pool. And for the most part, we’ve got good […]