>To You It’s A Keyboard, But To Me It’s A Key-bone

>You’re Olan Yahal Mitchell. The police have stopped you for speeding and they’re pretty sure you’re drunk. You decide you’re not taking any of those goddamn field sobriety tests and have scored yourself a seat in the front of a police cruiser because of it. So, what to do while you’re waiting to see what happens next?

Hmmm, that computer keyboard looks mighty scrumptious. Perhaps you should lick it. Yeah, you should. Hey, why not? Other folks have tried to chow down on the entire car, but you’ve always been more of an electronics man. Metal leaves a weird taste in your mouth.

That officer sure doesn’t seem to appreciate you doing that, does he? He mustn’t be the type to appreciate great tasting food. Yeah, go ahead, lick it again.

No, I have no idea why he would take the computer away from you. You were enjoying it! If there was ever a time to kick a cop, this must be it!

Sure you’re in handcuffs and off to jail now, but don’t fret. If you’re there for a while and behave well, maybe they’ll put you to work somewhere with a nice, juicy cash register.

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