He Gave Police A Leg Up On Catching Him

Ya know, it’s criminals like David Phillips that make police work look easy.

He stole a bunch of jewellery and other things. But they noticed at one crime scene that there were a series of right footprints and crutch marks, and whatdya know? They led back to Phillips’ apartment. Phillips just happens to only have one leg. Time to hop in a police cruiser and hop off to jail.

His lawyer said something that just sounded wrong.

John McLaughlin, defending, said: “He is hoping a prosthetic leg will be available soon which will enable him to lead a more active life.”

Uh, I think he’s already too active.

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