Here Comes The Bride…With A Gigantic Cartload Of Stolen Groceries

Weddings ain’t cheap, and I can certainly appreciate couples wanting to keep costs down especially in this time of economic uncertainty. But as with everything in this life, there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it.

The right way might involve keeping your eye out for sales, negotiating with catering services, seeing if you can somehow get a discount on your hall rental or being really nice to a buddy with a big yard who might let you hold the festivities there for free.

The wrong way, as demonstrated by the newly married Arthur Phillips III and Brittany M. Lurch, involves waltzing into a grocery store and then sashaying out a few minutes later with more than $1000 in food, forgetting the small matter of the cash registers in between.

Arthur Phillips III, 32, and Brittany M. Lurch, 22, both of Centre Hall, married Aug. 18, and scheduled their wedding reception for 5:30 p.m. Saturday, police said. But at 2:30 p.m., Patton Township police were called to Wegmans supermarket for a report of a retail theft.

They watched the couple on surveillance cameras put items in their shopping cart, and walk out to their car without paying, according to an affidavit filed by police. Police then arrested Phillips and Lurch, who told them the items were intended for their reception.

The pair has been charged with retail theft and receiving stolen property, both misdemeanours. They didn’t make it to the reception, since surprise surprise, they didn’t have the $2500 required to free themselves.

But wait, there’s more!

When they were arrested, police searched their vehicle and found a glass pipe with traces of marijuana on it, landing Philips a charge of possession of drug paraphernalia.

Given how the marriage is starting off, I fully expect one of us to be writing these two up for a parents of the year story at some point.

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