Pilots

Sighted folks I don’t know well love telling me this joke. The funny part is that just about all of them think I’m going to be offended but tell it anyway. Is this a common thing? does it happen to other classes of people?

“So Dave, you’re Jewish, are ya? I’ve got a good joke, but it’s about how cheap you guys are. You good with that? Don’t wanna hurt anybody’s feelings. I’m no racist.”

Passengers on a small commuter plane were waiting for the flight to leave. They were getting a little impatient, but the airport staff had assured them that the pilots would be there soon, and the flight could take off immediately after that.

The door opened, and two men walked up the aisle dressed in pilot uniforms – both wearing dark glasses. One was using a seeing-eye dog, and the other was tapping his way up the aisle with a cane. Nervous laughter spread through the cabin as the men entered the cockpit.

The door closed and the engines started up. The passengers began to glance nervously around, searching for some sign that this was just a little practical joke. None was forthcoming.

The plane moved faster and faster down the runway, and the people at the windows realized that they were headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport. As it began to look as though the plane would never take off and that it would plow into the water, panicked screams began to fill the cabin.

At that moment, the plane lifted smoothly into the air. The passengers relaxed and laughed a little sheepishly, and soon they had all retreated into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane was in good hands.

Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot turned to the pilot and said, “you know Bob, one of these days, they’re gonna scream too late, and we’re all gonna die.”

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