The Spying DVR: Because We Like It When Our TV Watches Us Back

No, this doesn’t sound creepy and over the line or anything. Nope, not in the slightest.

Fierce Cable was first to report on a patent application filed by Verizon that indicates the company is interested in gleaning more information about its viewers for the purpose of delivering more targeted advertisements.

So what might this spy-like technology look like?

Well, as Fierce Cable points out, a couple who is arguing might see an ad for couples therapy on their television or their mobile phone, while a pair who is cuddling could receive an ad for a weekend getaway.

The patent application, which was filed in May of 2011, states that the technology is intended to detect “ambient actions” of its users, including eating, laughing, talking, singing, humming, cleaning, and playing a musical instrument.

The application also outlines plenty of other things viewers may do with others, including fighting, playing a game, and yes, cuddling.

In case you haven’t figured it out yet, you’re reading about a potential DVR that spies on you in your own home. You know, because your ridiculously high cable bills aren’t enough money for these arseclowns.

And if that’s not enough, the damn thing will be able to detect people’s skin colour, their accents and see what kinds of “inanimate objects people surround themselves with.”

Lovely.

Finally, a reason for me to be happy that DVRs aren’t accessible to the blind. VCRs don’t seem quite so old and lame right about now.

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