There’s No Such Thing As Something For Nothing, Part 8103

Last Updated on: 15th July 2013, 09:12 pm

Update: Carin pointed out a pretty big oversight on my part, that being the soundtrack! Bowser and Blue Vasectomy

Brian’s Balls by the Arrogant Worms should be here too, but I can’t seem to find it.

In these tough economic times, the ability to save money is perhaps as important as it has ever been. Unfortunately however, it is a skill/luxury that does not come easily to many for a variety of reasons. One of these reasons, as anyone who knows anything about them would almost certainly agree, is children. Yes, they’re cute. Yes, you love them. But let’s be honest. Kids are little slobbering money pits that eventually grow into not so little slobbering money pits. It’s hard to say how big the pit actually is, but imagine how big 25 years would be if you could visualize it in physical form and then fill it with bills and cheques and you’ll start to understand the gravity of the situation.

But that being said, there are, of course, ways around this problem. One of the most common is the vasectomy, a procedure undergone by thousands of men each year. for many, the expense of the snip is worth the long-term savings, but I recognize that not everyone will see it that way. So too, it seems, does the Royal Institution of Australia, who would like to make you an offer you may or may not be able to refuse depending on your commitment to saving up for your so-called golden years.

For free, yes, absolutely free, the Institute will provide respected vasectomist dr. Doug Stein, a man with well over 30,000 cuts to his credit, to decommission your baby blaster. The only catch is that you have to be available on October 18th, 2013. Oh, and you’ll need to be ok with the big event being streamed live online for the world to see while the good doctor and some professors discuss human population issues as part of the first ever World Vasectomy Day.

Yup, total bargain!

“This event will take vasectomy out of the medical suite and into the homes of people who may never have considered vasectomy,” Institute director Paul Willis said in a statement. “It will be an important way of encouraging people to think about how their ecological footprint leaves its mark on the planet.”

I find it hard to believe that there’s a man on earth who hasn’t come home to a messy house full of screaming kids and not at least considered a vasectomy, but he’s the expert, so I’ll take his word that these people do in fact exist.

If you’re willing to put yourself on display for the possible betterment of mother earth, you can subscribe to a newsletter that will presumably tell you everything you could ever want to know right here. In keeping with our theme, the information does appear to be free.

I’m not sure who I’m more curious about, the people who would sign up to get a free genital operation on the internet or the people who will tune in to watch somebody get a free genital operation on the internet. Thoughts?

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10 Comments

  1. How strange but no more so than the goings on in the good old USA with the government poking around in our lady bits.

    1. Yes. Your government seems to have a very sad and dangerous fascination with those. There are a few MPs here who really want to open up the abortion debate again, but to our Prime Minister’s credit, he’s not having it so far.

  2. Good for Harper. Most of what I read about him is negative so glad he is doing something right.

  3. Don’t know how much you keep up with the war on women down here but one of the anti-choice leaders, Governor McConnell of Virginia, is in serious ethical trouble. His Attorney General, who is even worse, may be tarred with the same brush.

    1. I definitely remember that ultrasound bill. Scumbags. What ever became of the other states that were going to try to pass those? After this one made the rounds, the coverage seemed to die down here…at least until what just happened in Texas.

  4. Most of them passed in states where the Republicans have taken over the Legislature and Governor’s chair. It’s a disgrace. Texas is one of the worst of the worst but we probably have a dozen or more states who are shoving through restrictions, many humiliating, on choice. It has nothing to do with preserving life and everything to do with punishing the “bad girls” Makes me want to throw up or start throwing tampons at someone.

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