Black Friday Body Count: Missing Dinner With Your Family Is Wrong, Says A Woman Missing Dinner With Her Family

Remember when I said that people kind of suck? Just listen to this woman who lined up on goddamned Wednesday to make sure she didn’t miss anything on Thursday. Anything but Thanksgiving with her family, I should say.

For many retailers this year, Black Friday started on Thanksgiving Day. Luck called it “Blue Thursday” because “it’s sad,” she said.
“I’m going with the flow now, but I wish it would go back to the way it was,” she said. “It’s wrong to miss Thanksgiving dinner. It’s an American tradition.”

So wrong that there you are, blowing everyone in your family off to do just that. Oh, and in the process you’re also helping to ensure that things aren’t going back to the way they were. Hint: If you don’t show up, the stores will stop opening and nobody will have to miss dinner.

But for Luck, the deals were too good to pass up, especially with three teenage sons who all asked for big-ticket electronics for Christmas. If she spent $2,000 on two Dell laptops and three iPods, she calculated she would save $1,100.

You know your kids are probably getting you something crappy for Christmas, don’t you? And that they’re going to go back to acting like ungreatful shitheads as soon as it’s over if they even bothered to stop? Or that there’s this thing called the internet where you can buy cheap laptops and iPods from the comfort of your home as your turkey cooks so you don’t have to build a fake placeholding line body so you can safely go catch some warmth while waiting for stores to open in fucking Alaska?

People kind of suck.

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