Creamy Chocolate Kill?

I figure I’ll write about Timmy’s since it’s Canada Day. It seems appropriate.

A little while ago, Tim Horton’s came out with…something…called the Creamy Chocolate Chill. Wow, something is wrong with me…I’m blogging about some random food product. But there are two reasons I want to, so bear with me.

When I first heard about it, I didn’t even know what it was. Was it some kind of cake? Maybe it was a frozen treat? All the commercials would say was stuff like “It’s rich, it’s chocolatey! It’s a Creamy Chocolate Chill.” Someone would be sitting there going “mmmm mmmmm mmmm!” but that was about it. If you couldn’t see it, you had no idea what it was.

I went to the Timmy’s website, and I was able to figure out that it was a drink because it was under the drinks section, but this was all they wrote about it.

A delicious combination of real cream and layers of chocolaty goodness. It’s the perfect summer treat that takes chocolaty to the next level.

I still wasn’t quite sure what this was all about, so I decided to get one, and I got one for Steve too. I had a pretty goofy conversation with the Tim’s lady. It consisted of me saying “I have a question about your Creamy Chocolate Chill. …What is it?” So am I slow? Did anyone else wonder what the heck this was who couldn’t see the picture to get the big hint?

But maybe it was all a trick to get us to go buy them. Maybe I’m just one of their many sheep who fell for it…because once I bothered the lady to ask her to describe the thing, I almost felt committed to try one. So maybe they’re smarter than I think and this was all done on purpose, but somehow I doubt it.

And what did I think? Uuuuuug! Who enjoys this? As I was drinking it, I thought I needed to sing a song to my pancreas so I didn’t develop Diabetes on the spot.

They weren’t kidding when they said they were taking chocolatey to the next level. Holy crap, it was like drinking a cup full of syruppy cream. Every now and then I’d hit a chunk of chocolate stuff that was kind of good…but mostly, it was too much, and I’m’ a person who loves chocolate.

Steve agreed with me, and another friend said the same thing, so I know I’m not a weirdo.

So they may have gotten me once, but I don’t think I’ll buy another one of those suckers ever.

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5 comments
  1. Seriously, it’s waaaaaaaaay too much. Buy one once if you must (I probably would in spite of the warnings), but do it twice and I’m questioning your sanity. Honestly, you could achieve a similar experience much more cheaply by eating a couple of chocolate bars really fast and then chasing them with a great big bottle of chocolate sauce.

  2. Don’t forget to crush up a fudgesickle in there.

    1. Right. I knew I was forgetting something. That was even one of the good tasting parts.

  3. I haven’t noticed these yet, but Brad just told me he keeps hearing commercials on the radio for these things using the slogan “discover your chocolatey happy place.” Um, gross. Does nobody hire an innuendo department? It sounds like they want me to play with my ass.

  4. […] We live dangerously close to a Dairy Queen, so sometimes we get blizzards. For a while, we used to get the blizzards of the month, but then they took those away and brought in these Royal blizzards. That was the closest I could get, they don’t have their own page, but they do have their own heading. I have decided, after trying all of them, that they are DQ’s version of the Tim Hortons Creamy Chocolate Chill. […]

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