Stop Throwing Shit On The Field, You Morons!

I’m happy to read that police charged one of the imbeciles that was throwing beer cans and other crap at the field during the Jays game yesterday. It’s too bad it’s only one, but if there can be only one, at least they got the asshole who almost hit a baby.

Listen, you dopey motherfuckers. I know the blown call on Martin’s throw hitting Shin-Soo Choo almost certainly should have been ruled a dead ball but instead let in a run that could have cost us the game if Jose Bautista wasn’t yesterday’s most awesome man on the earth was off pissing, but it’s no excuse for acting like a pack of immature jackoffs. You want to talk about something costing us the game? What if you fucknuts acted so unruly that the environment was deemed to be unsafe and the Jays were forced to forfeit? Chew on that for a second. You would have gone down in history as the shitheads who acted so retardedly that you eliminated your team from the playoffs. But even if that was never going to be a real possibility, you’re still going to be remembered as the group of tools who threw stuff when you didn’t get your way. No good ever comes from that. It doesn’t change anything. That call was still going to be that call no matter how many umpires and innocent families you pelted with garbage. The only thing you could possibly alter is the perception of the Jays and their fans, and that’s not something to be proud of. God, you stunted weinerberries make me so mad.

That game, though. Like I said on Twitter, I’ve been watching baseball to varying degrees for 30 years now, and that was the damnedest thing I’ve ever seen. I can’t remember the last time I’ve gone from disgust and rage to complete joy and happiness so quickly. I hate to use a stupid term like emotional roller coaster when talking about a sporting event (especially one in which I was not competing), but that’s how it felt. Hopefully the ALCS against the Royals will be dull and boring by comparison. I don’t know how many more games like that last one my heart can take.

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