I’ve seen some ungodly stupid things in my wrestling fan days, but there was a five year period from about the end of 2006 to late 2011 where TNA was setting new standards in that department. If they weren’t new standards, they were standards not seen since turn of the century WcW. Interestingly, as coincidence would have it, both of those eras were largely under the creative control of the same man. That man? Our old pal Vincent Russo, of course.
In 2007, somebody (probably him because he fucking sucks), had a bright idea for a Christmas themed match. “What if we hung a barbed wire Christmas tree above the ring, put gift wrapped weapons underneath it and then had 4 dudes fight amongst this shit for no reason,” he thought. And because basically everyone else in TNA fucking sucked almost as much as he did, it was determined that this was a great idea and should be put on TV immediately. And so we got what was known as the Silent Night, Bloody Night Match. Why wasn’t it a Violent Night, Bloody Night Match, you ask. That would be because TNA couldn’t do anything right, because they fucking sucked.
You know what else fucking sucked? If you said literally everything about the match, good on you for paying attention.
Unfortunately I can’t find a video of this monstrosity in its entirety, but somebody somewhere has gone to the trouble of making one based around the recap from the Bryan and Vinny show, so I’ll give you that instead.
God, this match. It still sounds every bit as bad as I remember.
By the way, if you’ve never listened to Bryan and Vinny, you need to head over to F4W and sign up for a subscription right now. It’s by far my favourite wrestling podcast, and I say that knowing full well that other wrestling podcast hosts I enjoy read the site sometimes. Yes, it’s so good that I’m willing to hurt some feelings, hahaha.