The Long Mystery of the Ontario.Ca/Healthcareoptions commercial has been solved.

For a long time, this cute little commercial would come on TV telling people where they could go for various health care needs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-HXORRzxL4
It certainly caught my attention, and I thought, “who could possibly think of turning something as boring as health care options into a musical? but they’re smart.” But there was one line I could not understand. It was right before “or ya missed that last step.” I would listen to it over and over. I was convinced that she licked a friggin metal pole or something and her tongue was stuck to it.

Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore and started googling my face off. I googled and I googled, and after many different search terms, I found this jewel of a description. I’m not even being sarcastic. This is a super awesome description. If only every confusing commercial was broken down this well. For example, there was a commercial for Cialis.

Until I found some forum about commercials, I was deeply disturbed because I thought this mom was giving her son Cialis. All you hear is something about studying for chemistry, and then she goes into a bag and says “These are for you.” and the kid sort of quietly says “These are cool. Thanks, mom.” Then, the announcer says “Cialis: ask your doctor.” No no no, she’s giving him some headphones, probably big ol’ noise-canceling ones if ya know what I mean! But I would have had no freaking idea.

Two side notes: the French one isn’t nearly so cool,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMLKUYF9YAU
although it tens to make me laugh endlessly. I don’t know what it is about hearing commercials you know in one language put in another one, but I find it hilarious. It reminds me of something that happened when I was in Quebec on a French exchange. At the time, there was a popular tremclad commercial.

I saw it everywhere. But when I saw it in French, I could not stop laughing.

There I was, laughing my tail off at a friggin rust-protection commercial. The woman I was staying with must have thought I lost my mind.

Side note 2: this person needs to lighten up, although the description of the parents to be is pretty funny.

So yeah, fellow blind folks, there’s the description of what the hell is going on in that commercial. And a grown woman didn’t make the incredibly bad choice of licking a metal pole in the cold.

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