I Don’t Know What These Are, But I’m Going To Take All Of Them And There’s Nothing You Can Do About It

“Hey man, listen up. I’ve got a great idea.”

“Ok, I’m all ears.”

“So you know how there’s that tech company down on Dela Cruz Avenue?”

“Yeah. Roam something. What do they do, anyway?”

“I don’t know, but do you want to find out?”

“Sure, what the hell. But how?”

“Well, how about tonight, you and I head down there, break in and see what they’ve got going on?”

“Ok, but can we take some stuff?”

“Of course we can! That’s the whole point! We get in, check things out, jack as much shit as we can and split it.”

“Nice. But if we try to sell it, how do we make sure we know enough about what it is? We don’t need anyone getting suspicious.”

“We’ll figure that out once we get it home. It doesn’t make a difference what it is or what it does until then.”

“I guess…but what if they make tracking devices or something?”

“Oh come on! That’s not what they do.”

“How do you know? You said we were going to go and find ou…”

“Don’t worry about it! They have roam right in their name. Roaming is a cell phone thing.”

“Yeah…you’re right. It’s totally phones. Let’s do it! GPS trackers? What was I thinking? Jesus. I’m such an idiot.”

“Actually fellas, you’re both idiots.”

“These devices kind of look like cell phone chargers, so they probably thought they had some kind of street value,” Roambee Corporation Co-Founder Vidya Subramanian.
Subramanian is talking about the hundred or so GPS tracking devices that were stolen recently from the company’s Dela Cruz Avenue labs.
“The moment we realized they had a box of trackers, we went into recovery mode,” Subramanian said. “We notified the police and equipped them to track the devices, and in about 5 or 6 hours, it was done.”

But even if they hadn’t made things quite so easy, life on the run likely wasn’t going to last long for them thanks to one of the geniuses taking a beer from the fridge an managing to cut himself and bleed everywhere in the process, leaving DNA evidence for police.

The pair, who have not been identified, could be in a lot of trouble. Most of the devices were located in a warehouse full of drugs and other stolen property, so there could be charges pending in those cases as well.

“Wait, you said most of. What happened to the rest of the GPS units?”

Well, the two that weren’t found in the warehouse were found in a car. A car that was being driven around by our two unnamed friends here. All of which makes you wonder how they got away with anything ever, let alone enough to fill a warehouse. Hopefully we’ll get those answers at trial.

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