If You Need Something To Do, You Can Heat UP This Hot Dog

Serious question. Do pick-up techniques like those employed by Mustafa Demiray here ever actually work? I know that if I ever said anything to a woman to the effect of “hey, you’re bored, I’m bored, how’s about you lollipop my dong” it would be nothing but a ticket to the ICU to have the swelling treated, a shoe removed and the offending member reattached.

The woman, Demiray would reportedly tell cops, kept saying that she was bored and wanted to go home.
At one point, the woman sat down on a chair in a “small office/storage room” behind the cash registers. Demiray followed her inside.
Demiray, an arrest affidavit notes, told investigators that “since the woman was bored, he pulled out his penis and asked the victim if she wanted to give him a blowjob.” You know, as a way for them to jointly pass time on the lobster shift.
When the female worker declined to fellate him, Demiray “pulled his pants up.” Before exposing himself, Demiray advised, the woman gave him “a look” while she was on her cell phone.

I doubt that look meant what you think it meant, my dude. She was on her phone, for a start. And we all know it’s impolite for one to talk with one’s mouth full. So there’s that, plus the small matter of you likely creeping her the hell out.

Fortunately for Mr. Demiray, his mistake wasn’t a ticket to his local trauma centre. It was, however, a ticket to his local holding tank on a charge of indecent exposure.

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