Gotta Go. Bone’s Dead

Never lie to your doctor. If you’ve somehow managed to lose a phone cable up your dong, just say so. Any embarrassment you may suffer will almost certainly pale in comparison to the week of unnecessary pain you’ll go through while they try to figure out why they can’t find the headphones you said you …

There’s No Good Answer To This Question, So That’s A Strike

I like Cash Cab as much as anyone. It’s fun to play along with. But why in the name of god are they showing it on the Sci-Fi channel? Yes, they ask some science questions, but it’s still almost as ridiculous a stretch as CSI and Big Bang Theory being on Discovery because they’re shows …

Uh-oh Uh-oh Uh-oh Telus

If you’ve registered to be notified by text message when there are COVID vaccine appointments available and have heard nothing but a combination of silence and chatter from your friends about how quickly they were able to book their own times, this may be why. The region is asking Telus customers who preregistered for a …

iPhone And Windows Sounds, The A Cappella Edition

Here’s a minute and change worth of a cappella renditions of iPhone sound effects because hey, why not? The group is called Maytree, they’re from South Korea, and their versions are hilariously accurate. They even made me jump and cringe when the damn alarm went off even though it’s the middle of the afternoon and …

You Hitting The Curb Means I Fixed It

There’s an old saying that goes you can’t legislate common sense. Neither, it seems, can you appoint it to the bench. Just ask the Michigan judges who ruled that a tire rotation was completed by a mechanic even though said mechanic missed the very important part of the procedure where you tighten all of the …

Please Don’t Swing On The Hydro Lines, Say Officials To People They Think Might Somehow Understand Words

I’m not sure what the stupidest thing I’ve done while drunk is. Not because I’m usually too far gone to remember things like that, but because generally speaking I’m not the kind of person who does a lot that could be classified as seriously, terminally dumb. For instance, it’s rather unlikely that you’ll ever find …

I Got My First COVID Shot!

“I need vaccination, vaccination, vaccination…” and I got it! My first shot anyway. Yup, this afternoon, I got my first COVID vaccine. You might be wondering why the heck I was able to get a vaccine right now. You didn’t think I was quite that old yet. Well I’m not, but I have medical conditions …

Bye Bye, Farewell, You’re Leavin’.

More and more often, I’m seeing these screen-reader accessibility overlays. They promise better accessibility for screen-reader users. At best, they do nothing. At worst, they make things worse. I saw one at Mastermind Toys that was making it virtually impossible to shop there. If they didn’t have a chat function, the Seppa-Tebby-Tebby nephew wouldn’t have …