From New Mexico’sRio Grande Sun. 1:33 p.m. — A caller said a man was asleep in a car on Bond Street, but he was stepping on the accelerator while Chihuahuas escaped from his car. Police found the intoxicated man running around Vietnam Veterans Park chasing his Chihuahuas; a sober driver picked him up. Hopefully once …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Fingers
Ted is working at the lumberyard, pushing a tree through the buzz saw. In a horrible accident, he accidentally shears off all ten of his fingers. He rushes to the emergency room at the local hospital as fast as he can. The ER doctor says, “Wow! that’s pretty bad. Don’t worry, give me the fingers, …
Guess What, We Have Traps For That Now
You’re not gonna believe this, but there are people out there who see nothing wrong withusing a .44 magnum to kill mice. And I’m sure you’ll be stunned by this one too, these people live in a trailer. And just to complete the trifecta, the mice appear to have survived unharmed, naturally. The woman, 43, …
What Were They Expecting, Recipes And Laundry Tips?
Russia bans 1950s-era book about Hitler by U.K. historian: report A history book about Adolf Hitler has been banned in Russia because it includes quotes insulting to Russians and Jews, according to a report. Prosecutors said Tuesday that a Russian court has banned the 1953 book Hitler’s Table Talk: 1941-1944 by British historian Hugh Trevor-Roper. …
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If Look ‘N’ Stop Has Stopped, Here’s What To Do
Right off the top, if you’re not using theLook ‘N’ Stop Firewall,feel free to skip to the next post unless you’re one of those people who reads everything just because. For those of you still with me, hopefully I can save you from going through the trouble I just had. In the new batch of …
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He Should Have Just Said He Was At A Yard Sale
The best word I can come upwith to describe this one is what the fuck? Timothy J. Placko was stopped by police in Port St. Lucie, Florida, who noticed his van driving down a wooded trail Sunday night. I don’t quite know how to describe what happened next, so some snips will have to do. …
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I’m Surprised He Didn’t Have Golf Clubs With Him Too
It’s things like this that make me wonder why I bother getting up every morning. A man was hit by lightning and killed during Tuesday night’s violent thunderstorm in Toronto. Witnesses said the 29-year-old man was struck while taking shelter under a tree at Christie Pits in central Toronto at about 8 p.m. An autopsy …
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I Did What? I’m Seeing Judge Who?
The story of Brett Tyler Schatte would have been a pretty good one even without being able to play the name game. I mean you know it’s been a hell of a night when you’re finally hauled into the clink after walking naked into a convenience store at 10 to 3 in the morning, eating …
>I’d Send The Guy A Sympathy Card, But I Doubt He Has Time For It
>The next time you feel like bitching about a few spam emails finding their way to your inbox, stop a moment and spare a thought for poor Colin Wells, who receives around44000 of the things every single day. According to ClearMyMail, a company that appears to have saved this poor bastard’s internet life, his totals …
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More On The Fruits And Nuts Who Regulate Fruits And Nuts
There’s a great article in the Washington Post about the European Union’s ridiculous fruit and vegetable regulations. Reading it leads me to a question. How can anybody possibly stand living there? I know government is horrible everywhere for all kinds of reasons, but lord love a duck, just look at some of this crap! Consider …
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