I’m certainly not what you’d call a religious person, but even I would have a hard time resisting the urge to wear a shirt with a cross on it that says “Gone to see Dad. …Be back soon to pick you up. –Jesus” And while we’re at it, here’s a nice list of gifts for …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
It’s Chr***mas Time In The City
This right here boggles my mind, so please, everybody on the bus as we travel down the road to absurdity. Ottawa’s Elmdale Public School created controversy recently when it was learned that teachers had decided to change the lyrics to one of the songs that was to be sung during a holiday singalong assembly. the …
Worst Band Names Of 2007
The part of The Onion that doesn’t make shit up has published a list ofthe worst band names of the year,but for some reason, Band.Zero isn’t on it. The list by itself is great for a whole lot of laughs, but in order to up the awesome, it comes with site links for about 99% …
Your Stupid Joke For Today
Judge: “You say you’re petitioning for a legal name change?” Leon: “Yes, your honor.” Judge (looking at petition): “I can see why, your name is Leon… Shitferbrains, is it?” Leon: “Yes, your honor.” Judge: “And what do you want to change your name to, Mr. Shitferbrains?” Leon: “Melvin, your honor.”
Nobody’s Safe Anymore
If it isn’t already, the world should soon find itself on high alert, because the USB missile launcher has gone wireless! Like the wired version, the new launcher is controlled by a little targetting app running on a Windows PC. This time round, what’s plugged into said system is a dish-like wireless transmitter that can …
The Stupidest Hero I’ve Ever Had
The next time you’re drinking at a party and think you’re hot shit because you can hold it well, consider this story. A 64-year-old German air passenger almost popped his clogs earlier this week after quaffing a litre of vodka officials told him he couldn’t take on the aircraft. According to Spiegel, the man was …
My Bowl Runneth Over
Dawn Herb, the woman hauled into court forswearing at her toilet,hashad her charges thrown out and will not have to do any time or part with any money. District Judge Terrence Gallagher earlier this week dismissed the charge on the grounds that while Herb’s language “may be considered by some to be offensive, vulgar and …
If This Post Sucks, It’s Google’s Fault
Somebody please tell me if I’m reading the end ofthis articlewrong or missing something, because I fail to see how gang members using a certain brand of baseball caps as part of the outfit becomes something that the company needs to be held responsible for. Think of it this way. If I buy a computer …
It’s That Time Of Year Again
Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch [M-LAW[ has announced the winners of this year’s Wacky Warning Labels Contest, and as usual, there are some doozies. “DANGER: AVOID DEATH” WARNING WINS TOP PRIZE IN M-LAW’S ELEVENTH ANNUAL WACKY WARNING LABEL CONTESTA label on a small tractor that warns, “Danger: Avoid Death,” has been chosen as the nation’s most …
>Since We’re Not Helping Anybody, You Might As Well Help Yourself
>Maybe it’s just me, but something about the idea ofcops sticking yellow tickets to parked cars that have visible packages inside of themsounds more like crime assistance than prevention. They can say they’re trying to help remind people to better secure their purchases all they want, but there has to be a better way of …
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