Did Somebody Say Extra Ketchup?


This is basically your standard “I am displeased with the level of customer service and attention to detail at this establishment and shall soon turn to physical means to express such” story. We’ve been collecting them for ages, but I’m still sometimes surprised by how many there are.

Mayra Berenice Gallo
Photo of Mayra Berenice Gallo.

Mayra Berenice Gallo, 24, allegedly became enraged when she discovered there was not enough ketchup in the order when the incident occurred on Oct. 27.
After ordering in the drive-thru of the McDonald’s restaurant in the 1500 block of North Bristol Street in Santa Ana, California, she went into the restaurant through the employee entrance and asked for more ketchup.
The manager told her she couldn’t be in the building and Gallo allegedly “became combative” and started pushing, punching and choking the employee, police said.
Another worker tried to intervene and called other employees to help, the video showed.
A man who was believed to be with Gallo is credited with stopping the attack when he pulled the woman off the manager. The two then left the restaurant.

It took police a while, but they have arrested her and she’ll likely be facing assault charges.

How Do You Say Is Ear Of Owner On Special Tonight In Chinese

Customers and employees argue over restaurant food all the time, but rarely does one incident lead to three 911 calls.

Deputies say 24-year-old Jade Anderson walked ito the restaurant complaining about her order. She was complaining to the owners, who are also the victims in the assault.
Due to a language barrier, the victim’s son translated what Anderson was saying to his parents. That’s when Anderson allegedly pushed the son and threw her food onto the floor. She then started assaulting the female victim, and the male victim stepped in to protect his wife.
That’s when Anderson started assaulting the man. As she was pushed out of the store, she bit the man on the ear, partially detaching it.

To make matters worse, further investigation revealed that while Anderson was out on her food run turned crime spree, her child was at home by itself, presumably not biting off anyone’s ear.

So far she’s not in any extra trouble for that, but the assault and assault with intent to Mame charges that could land her ten years worth of jail may be trouble enough for the moment.

Assault And Vinegar

What goes better with dip than chips?

A South Carolina man turned violent in a dispute over salt-and-vinegar potato chips, authorities said.
Ryan Dean Langdale, 19, had warned his 17-year-old cousin not to eat his chips, but when his relative did, Langdale shot him, authorities said Wednesday.
“Do not touch my chips, or I’ll shoot you,” the cousin said Langdale had warned him, the Post and Courier of Charleston reported.

The charges of attempted murder and using a firearm in a violent crime that Langdale was going to be facing anyway would have been bad enough, but he managed to compound his stupidity and tack on one for obstruction of justice by tampering with the crime scene and trying to claim that the shooting was the result of a self-inflicted cleaning it and it went off accident.

Maybe he was cleaning out all the chip dust?

A Jarring Experience

When Alfonzo Stanley’s daughter made the mistake of eating some of his food, the 50-year-old reacted in the calm, understanding manner in which one would expect a father to react. He brained her with a jar of Doritos Nacho Cheese Dip.

Wait, Doritos makes cheese dip? I didn’t know that.

According to his arrest report, 50-year-old Alfonzo Stanley told police he hit his adult daughter because she was trying to eat his food.
Stanley’s daughter told police she tried to replace the food after her father said it was his, but he attacked her and slammed a glass jar of Doritos Nacho Cheese Dip into the left side of her face, the report said.
When police interviewed the woman at a friend’s apartment in the same complex she was holding a blood-soaked towel against the side of her face and had multiple cuts. The woman was taken to University Medical Center and needed a total of 40 stitches.

When police talked to Stanley, he said that the reason he hit her with the jar is because it was there. Had his cane been the first thing he saw, he told them, he would have hit her with that instead.

Good thing they weren’t near the car.

Stanley was taken into custody and charged with one count of domestic battery resulting in substantial bodily harm.

Somebody’s Cheesed Off Now…

This story about two men in their 70’s fighting over cheese samples is a funny enough scene on its own. One fellow repeatedly cut in line at free sample stations in front of this other fellow until they had words about it and the line-cutter hit the other guy. But for some reason, there’s a part of me that wonders if, in a couple of years, my dad could be one of the guys in the fight.

My dad is in his 70’s, a scary fact I know, and sometimes he can be a little bit cranky. Steve and I joke that he has a limited supply of chipper tokens and when he runs out, there are rough times ahead. I think for now, the only ones who are aware of the loss of tokens are family, but what does the future hold?

In my dad’s case, it would probably only amount to dad having some choice, probably hilarious, words with a guy cutting in line. I couldn’t see dad cutting in line or smacking anyone. But I definitely could see a future where he would lip someone off for doing something like that if he was especially frustrated. Hopefully I’m wrong. I’m glad he doesn’t have a Costco membership…for now.

Quarter Pounder

I don’t make a habit of it and I feel a little bad whenever I do, but there have been times when I’ve paid for things with nothing but change. Thank goodness none of those times was a transaction at Islam El Masry’s food cart. I enjoy Sriracha, but not when it’s applied directly to my eyes. But hey, at least he was nice enough to give the poor woman some racial slurs for free…allegedly.

The owner of a downtown food cart was arrested on misdemeanor assault charges this afternoon after hurling a Gatorade bottle at a black customer and then allegedly spraying her with Sriracha.
A video taken by the alleged victim, Carlotta Washington, was provided to Willamette Week by an eyewitness. It shows Islam El Masry, owner of the Small Pharoah’s halal cart, arguing with Washington, who claims that El Masry called her the n-word after she attempted to pay for her lunch with quarters.
The video shows El Masry telling her to “get the fuck away” from the cart, then throws a Gatorade bottle at her, causing her to drop her phone.

Washington says that El Masry then sprayed her with Sriracha chili sauce, though that is not on the video.
“It was in my eyes and all on my skin. It was burning terribly,” Washington says.

I don’t know how many quarters it was going to take Washington to pay for her food, but El Masry will need about 16,000 of them if he’s going to make bail.

He’s An Easy Temper

Not sure who comes off looking worse here, honestly. Off-duty McDonald’s employee Phillip Bailey for chucking a smoothie at a 91-year-old man during a stupid drive thru argument, or Johnnie Douglas, the 91-year-old man in question, for reacting to the yogurt-based assault by returning fire with an actual gun.

The Indiana McDonald’s altercation that later led to a firearm being discharged arose from an argument in the drive thru according to the Richmond Police Department. Authorities report that there was a bit of rage between two cars next to each other in the drive thru and an argument eventually ensued. Once Phillip Bailey received his order he reportedly threw his smoothie at 91 year old Johnnie Douglas’ car.  Douglas then responded by firing a revolver at Bailey, who was unharmed. Douglas and Bailey were both arrested and Douglas was charged with criminal recklessness, while Bailey was charged with intimidation and disorderly conduct.

By the way, I’ve just learned that I am apparently unable to hear the name Philip Bailey without needing to listen to this song. Just me?

Cap’n Cord

I don’t necessarily advocate this sort of thing, but seriously, close the damn box, man. Is this really that hard?

According to police, the victim said that Smith became upset upon discovering the stale cereal and blamed him for failing to keep the Cap’n Crunch fresh. Smith was especially perturbed since he is missing teeth and had difficulty consuming the stale cereal.
At one point, Smith demanded that his roommate remove his dentures so that he could experience how hard it was to consume the Cap’n Crunch. When the man refused, Smith allegedly began striking the victim with an electrical cord.

You know, the more I read, the more I think I get Duane Barry Smith. There’s the unless the box has suffered damage during opening, fucking shut it issue that we’ve already covered, but the man also has good taste in bad cereal. Cap’n Crunch is the friggin best, no room for argument.

Anyway, the beating caused Smith’s unidentified roommate injuries to his face, arm and hand. He is expected to be fine and to know better in the future, for Christ’s sake.

Smith, meanwhile, has been charged with domestic violence and may or may not be in custody. A jail official declined to comment when contacted, citing the facility’s policy of not commenting on the status of cereal offenders. Only half of that last sentence is true. I’ll let you decide for yourselves which one it is.

I Thought The French Were Supposed To Have Good Taste In Food

I’ve said it before, and though judging from this ridiculousness it may be one of my more unpopular opinions, I’ll say it again. Nutella is bad. But here people in France are, fighting over the stuff like it’s Black Friday or something.

Brawls have broken out in French supermarkets as shoppers scramble to get their hands on discounted pots of chocolate and hazelnut spread.
Chaotic scenes were filmed in several supermarkets across the country operated by the Intermarche chain, which offered massive discounts on pots of Nutella.
The promotion, launched on Thursday, reduced the price of more than a million 950-gram pots from 4.70 euros ($7.23) to 1.41 ($2.16).
In one video posted on Twitter, customers are seen shoving each other and shouting as they try to get as many pots as possible. According to Le Parisien newspaper, shoppers started to fight in the northern town of Ostricourt, prompting police to step in.

There’s video in the story linked above, video which I would happily have embedded here if only media companies cared as much about accessibility as we do. Even half as much would be nice, really.

Chocolate Chipped Tooth

This is pretty much your standard, garden variety food feud, which is sad. Things like these are supposed to be dumb and weird, not barely worth a comment.

Richard Anthony Hessic was upset that someone ate the last chocolate chip cookie and that his girlfriend of three years wasn’t taking him seriously, according to police. She told police she didn’t want to argue about something so petty, so she told him she’d buy more cookies.
She went to go try and take a shower, but Hessic followed her, police said. He felt like she was blowing him off, so he ripped down the shower curtain and punched her in the face.

He was charged with domestic battery. No mention was made of her injuries, if any.