You Say Tomato, I Say “Motherfucker, I’ll Stab You In Your Fucking Face”

I think we might have bigger problems than simple tomatos here. Gates’s grandmother told police that the teenager “began to throw a fit because she couldn’t have more tomatoes at the dinner table.” Gates allegedly threw a water bottle at her grandfather and a pack of cigarettes at a 73-year-old female relative (who was struck […]

I Told You I’d Beat The Pulp Out Of You

I imagine this particular pumpkin was likely meant for carving, but I’m still counting its fate as a food feud because roasted pumpkin seeds are yummy and because pumpkin pie exists. Police say that when they responded to the couple’s Largo residence, the victim was “covered in pumpkin seeds and pulp.” Garisto, cops noted, was […]

If You Want Something Done Right, Do It Yourself. And Maybe Attack A Pregnant Lady While You’re AT It

I’ve been posting stories like this one forever, but I’m still amazed by them sometimes. I just simply cannot imagine being this angry about something so trivial. What has to be going on in your life that a fucked up McChicken is your last damn straw? I understand maybe getting a bit upset, saying a […]