The Dumbest Smart Laundry System Ever

Ten years ago, I wrote this frustrating rundown of trying to refill my laundry card. That was 10 years ago! And the sad thing is very little has changed. We have made some improvements, but the system still has some pretty big flaws in it, and the flaws are brain-snappingly stupid. Back in November, for […]

I Get Rough And Tough In The Puff ‘n’ Fluff! Noooo!

That soundtrack has nothing to do with the subject matter, but it’s what enters my head whenever I think about this invention…along with the imagined distressed sounds of dogs. I feel like a jerk making fun of an invention dreamed up by a third-grader, and maybe I can’t judge until I’ve actually laid hands on […]

Rapper’s Delight By Siri, Alexa And Google Assistant

My first thought listening to this was damn, how much time must it have taken to gather all these sound samples and get the timing right? Turns out the answer is about a month. Despite the amazing lyricism and irresistible disco-rhythms at play in the track, aspiring rappers shouldn’t fear that their efforts will soon […]

Take Me Home, Country Roads, The Electric Toothbrush Edition

Take Me Home, Country Roads played by five electric toothbrushes and two electric typewriters. The John Denver toothbrush also drives on his RC car. Googly eyes on the road! It’s been a whole year since you first requested this John Denver song. But I decided to wait until the right time of the year to […]