Which Black Sock Goes With Which Black Sock .com

Would anybody care to enlighten me as to who the target market for this $190 batch of internet-connected socks is? Because I’ve got nothin’.

That video is in what sounds like German, so if like me you can’t see what’s happening you’re not going to get a whole lot out of it. But there’s this, which tells you everything you need to know assuming the words $190 internet-connected socks wasn’t more than enough.

Calf socks classic with Plus+: Probably the smartest socks in the world

Probably the smartest men’s dress socks in the world: Our classic calf socks can now communicate with your iPhone as all Plus+ socks have a communication button.
Start out by ordering a Starter kit of 10 pairs of black calf socks Plus+ and your own personal Sock Sorter to translate between your socks and your iPhone.

Imagine your phone could communicate with your socks. Your phone would know:

  • which socks belong together,and could help sort them out,
  • how often you have washed your socks,
  • when your socks were produced,
  • when you ordered your socks
  • and

  • when your socks were dispatched.

Your iPhone can also tell you if your black socks are no longer properly black and help you buy new socks.
This is something we dreamed about and we have made the dream come true.

That’s so sad. Though not quite as sad as knowing that somebody someplace is buying them, I suppose.

Only two of these features would be remotely useful to me, and most folks wouldn’t even need the second one.

Quickly and easily knowing it’s time to order new socks before I run out? Cool. Everybody could use that. And as a blind guy, it is handy to know which socks go together. That’s a real pain in the ass sometimes. But fortunately it’s a problem I can already solve for free, not to mention that this batch of socks are all supposed to be the same colour anyway, are they not?

Nobody’s going to listen, but I’m going to say this one more time. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. I *can* reach over and stick my finger in this outlet, but I *shouldn’t*, because it would be painfully stupid. Kind of like a wiFi cookie jar, or an app that tells you when to drink water or yes, electronically sorted socks.

RealDonaldContext: A Built-in Tweet Fact Checker Because America’s President Lies A Lot

If you can’t quite bring yourself to remove Donald Trump from your internet entirely, now you can at least ensure that you’re getting a somewhat more accurate presidential experience by installing RealDonaldContext, the Washington Post’s new Chrome extension and Firefox add-on that will allow you to fact-check his tweets.

What a world we live in when one of the country’s biggest newspapers feels it necessary to do something like this.

GM Just Launched A Car Sharing Service In Kitchener Waterloo

I won’t be using this on a regular basis myself since the world still hasn’t come around to the idea of giving driver’s licenses to blind people, but I can absolutely imagine giving it a go when we have far away visitors who can drive but don’t have a car or can’t bring it with them. Car-sharing service Maven makes its Canadian debut in Waterloo Region

Maven is a keyless system. Users reserve a car using their Apple or Android phone and the app both unlocks and starts the vehicle via Bluetooth connection. A gas card is kept inside each vehicle. Prices start at $7 per hour for a Chevrolet Spark and range up to $15 per hour for a GMC Yukon.
“The beauty of Maven is it’s a completely keyless operation,” said Hassani. “We’ve got brand new vehicles. We’ve got the best vehicles you can imagine.
“All our cars have Apple CarPlay and Android Auto. There is a free Wi-Fi hotspot in each vehicle with unlimited data. [There are] OnStar safety features that nobody else can touch. So, it’s a premium product, a premium offering, nobody else comes close to it, and with really strong price points.”

The company currently has five vehicles — a Chevy Spark, Malibu and Cruze, a GMC Yukon and a Buick Encore — stationed at its Waterloo Region outpost, located in downtown Kitchener off Charles Street West, just across the street from Communitech.

I Had No Idea That All This Stuff Was On Spotify

I’m a big Spotify fan, though sometimes I don’t use it as much as I’d like. It’s already more than worth the subscription price based on the huge selection of music and comedy, but it just got a little better now that I’ve discovered that you can also use it to stream classic novels, short stories, poetry, basic language lessons, classic speeches, meditation exercises and coolest of all for me personally, old radio shows.

Before TV, there was radio drama, and it was glorious. Fortunately, a lot of old radio shows have been saved and are still available for your listening pleasure. You can listen to some sci-fi greats like George Orwell’s radio version of 1984, multiple volumes of the Twilight Zone radio show, and some of Isaac Asimov’s best radio works, like Hostess and Pebble In the Sky. You can also find some great mystery shows like Dragnet, and some vintage superhero stories from the likes of the Blue Beetle. If you’re looking to laugh, I personally recommend the Baby Snooks show.

I wonder how much of that stuff you’d have to listen to before it starts messing with your Discover Weekly or if whatever magic is responsible for features like that filters it out.

If The News And Social Media Are Driving You Bonkers, Maybe Some Of This’ll Help

The news is terrifying. What a shitty place the world is. I’m afraid to go online or turn on the TV. I can’t take it anymore.

I’m hearing these things more and more from people lately and with every mass shooting, bombing, racist incident, protest, Brexit and whatever the fuck is going on in the United States it only gets worse. I’m not sure there’s a one size fits all approach to staying absolutely sane in these times, but there’s some good, common sense advice here that some of you probably need to see.

I have been getting very emotionally caught up in the Internet lately. It hasn’t helped that there has been terrible tragic news on a regular basis and everyone seems to have a strong opinion about it. It also doesn’t help that our country’s election cycle is a circus and someone affiliated with a candidate who is about to lead our country says something stupid or wrong. I’ve felt this trickle down to the point where I’ve started to dislike people I actually like… because of the way they respond to the news cycle online. It’s making me depressed. I know I should “unplug” and be the smarter, patient, understanding person that I want to see in the world, but as a coach and parent, it is also my job to be able to respond to what my kids ask me about the news cycle, and the opinions that they hear. How do I balance this without letting it get to me? Is there any way to be plugged into the world without getting incredibly overwhelmed and saddened by it?
Who isn’t feeling this way lately? Without even clicking through to read articles, the headlines on the front page of CNN.com can feel like an assault. Add in all of the unsolicited (crazy) opinions about these “news” items from people you love on Facebook, and it can be a heroic feat to even look at the internet most days. So, first of all, you’re not wrong to feel this way. This is a very normal, universal response to the current state of things. Here’s how to manage it.

You should read the whole thing if you need it, but the TLDR version basically goes like this:

  • Just because somebody posts it doesn’t mean it’s news. We get information faster than ever before, and an awful lot of it is garbage. It’s perfectly fine to not make time to read it all.
  • Along that same line, pick a non-garbage source or two, get what you need to stay reasonably informed from them and don’t bother with everything else.
  • It’s ok to not know everything about everything all the time, even if you’re the person people tend to come to with questions. Saying you don’t know now and then isn’t a crime.
  • Twitter and Facebook have mute and block functions for a reason. Use ’em.
  • Find comfort in your like-minded friends. Bitch to each other, complain to each other, make fun of the stupid imbeciles that have driven you to this point together.
  • Be a little selfish. It’s ok to unplug and focus on yourself now and then, especially if the alternative is hating everyone.

Like I said, it won’t solve all of the problems (Trump is probably still gonna be here when you come back), but something is certainly better than nothing.

Good luck.

Daily Mail? More Like Daily Fail, Says Wikipedia

The issue of the Daily Mail’s dubious reliability isn’t a new topic here (we’ve covered it at least once and I’ve done my bit to steer folks away from it in other settings as well), but while I knew we absolutely weren’t the only ones to feel this way, the news that Wikipedia is mostly banning its use as a reference shows just how alone we aren’t.

Yes, Wikipedia, which is a seriously amazing thing but one that some would argue has a reputation for poor fact checking in its own right, has decided to stop using the Mail as a source in all but exceptional circumstances because of its general unreliability.

I’m mostly in favour of this, I think. When your bread and butter is clickbate headlines, stretching facts to their breaking points or even outright making things up and it’s hard to distinguish any of it from your real journalism, you deserve to be treated this way and don’t have a whole lot of room to argue about it. But the Mail is hardly the only outlet around that does these kinds of things and if you look hard enough even organizations that do their best get hoaxed more than you’d probably think, so I hope Wikipedia’s processes are strong enough to tell the difference without becoming susceptible to the agendas of folks who may have an axe to grind with this or that place.

Wikipedia editors have voted to ban the Daily Mail as a source for the website in all but exceptional circumstances after deeming the news group “generally unreliable”.
The move is highly unusual for the online encyclopaedia, which rarely puts in place a blanket ban on publications and which still allows links to sources such as Kremlin backed news organisation Russia Today, and Fox News, both of which have raised concern among editors.

The editors described the arguments for a ban as “centred on the Daily Mail’s reputation for poor fact checking, sensationalism and flat-out fabrication”.
The Wikimedia Foundation, which runs Wikipedia but does not control its editing processes, said in a statement that volunteer editors on English Wikipedia had discussed the reliability of the Mail since at least early 2015.
It said: “Based on the requests for comments section [on the reliable sources noticeboard], volunteer editors on English Wikipedia have come to a consensus that the Daily Mail is ‘generally unreliable and its use as a reference is to be generally prohibited, especially when other more reliable sources exist’.

“This means that the Daily Mail will generally not be referenced as a ‘reliable source’ on English Wikipedia, and volunteer editors are encouraged to change existing citations to the Daily Mail to another source deemed reliable by the community. This is consistent with how Wikipedia editors evaluate and use media outlets in general – with common sense and caution.”

Trump Filter: Make The Internet Great Again

I don’t have Google Chrome on my computer right now, but this may just speed things up.

Delete Donald Trump from the Internet.

  • Install the Chrome extension
  • Browse the Internet you love
  • Adjust filter settings on the fly
  • Make America great again

Download from the Chrome Web Store

Frequently Asked Questions
How does Trump Filter work?
Trump Filter is a Chrome extension that searches the web pages you visit for references to Donald Trump. It then makes those references disappear with three adjustable levels of severity.
Really. Simply install the Chrome extension through the Chrome Web Store and you’ll never have to see Donald Trump on the Internet again.
Can I delete him from television too?
Tragically, Trump Filter cannot be installed on your television. However, we hope that enough installs will be a strong signal to the international media that America is ready to move on from this inveterate jackass.

Is this available for mobile or Safari or Firefox?
The amount of time I’ve pumped into this dumpster fire of a presidency is already appalling. I’m afraid I don’t have the time to introduce this functionality to anything other than Chrome for Desktop. The code is open source though – anyone is welcome to port it to other platforms.

Are you surprised that he won?
You’re “surprised” at a birthday party. You’re “surprised” at Christmas. What I am is a kind of educated terror that defies English description. We are so fucked.

If He Was Hoping To Get Screwed, I Don’t Know Why He’s Complaining

A man in Oregon who’s name was not provided so we’ll just call him Dumbass found himself short a set of clothes, a wallet and a phone after they were stolen from his motel room during a Tinder date that went wrong before it really even started.

Police say the man had been communicating with a woman who called herself Lacey for about two months before they arranged to meet Tuesday. She told him to leave the door unlocked and that she would be there shortly. He then decided to take a shower while he waited.
When the man emerged from the shower he found all of his belongings were gone.

When reporting the theft to police, Dumbass lived up to his name by telling them that he didn’t know what his date’s last name was. Dude, seriously. Had you been thinking with the head on top, wouldn’t you have asked for a last name by like maybe conversation two or three? She might give you a fake one, but at least it gives you and the cops you’re eventually going to need something to go on since more people than you’d think aren’t smart enough to use different aliases every time.

Things only got worse when he tried to show them her profile only to find it had been deleted because yeah, duh.

As for Lacey or whatever her name is, I hope this is her job and she’s got several marks on the go because if it’s not, two months is an awful lot of work to put in for a used phone, an undetermined amount of money and a pair of dude pants.

Who Took The Cookies From The Cookie Jar? Why Not Ask the Built-in Camera

Normally when I hear about one of these internet connected household gadgets, my first thought is who the hell is this for? But that’s not the case with SKE Labs’ smart jar. Once I get my hands on one, it’s going to be easier than I ever imagined possible to tell something to kiss my ass while I stuff my face with Oreos, which is an awesome use of the future any way you look at it.

SKE (Smart Kitchen Ecosystem) Labs is on a mission to make your kitchen work for you rather than the other way around. Its first product is Neo, a sensor-equipped smart jar that keeps track of what’s inside it, which is communicated to a connected device via Bluetooth. This might sound trivial, but having a ‘conscious’ jar in the kitchen can go a long way to making your life easier — and healthier. As Neo can track the weight of its contents, measuring scoops of flour or sugar for a recipe, for example, is as easy as looking at the app. And Neo can tell you if you’ve eaten one too many cookies by showing you the nutritional contents of the food you’ve removed from the jar right down to the calories, carbohydrates, fat, and protein.
The smart jar can also assist in meal prep. When the food in the jar gets low, Neo will send an alert to add its contents to your grocery list. The app will suggest recipes based on what’s inside, and it will track ‘best before’ dates to avoid using spoiled food in a dish. On top of being smart, Neo also hits some necessities on the container side of things as well. The smart jar is dishwasher safe, has an airtight lid, and looks pretty good as jars go.

Alright, ya got me. Who the hell is this for?

  1. If you need a computer to tell you to take it easy on the Chips Ahoy, you’re either a child, an imbecile or were raised by wolves in a jungle somewhere far away from an education system. And what if I’m being nice and grabbing a couple cookies for myself and a couple for someone else? The stupid jar is going to be giving me the “Hey fatass!” warning unfairly and probably judging me from the cloud for the rest of time, the dick.
  2. Best before dates are garbage a lot more times than you’d think. There are plenty of things that, assuming they’re stored correctly, last weeks or months longer than the date on the packaging would have you believe. If you’re the type to blindly follow what a shiny display tells you without a smell, look, touch or heaven forbid a tiny taste test, you’re going to wind up throwing a lot of things away unnecessarily, costing yourself quite a bit of money in the process. Then again if you’re the sort of person who would intentionally purchase a jar with internet access, perhaps that’s not much of a concern for you.
  3. There’s a much cheaper way to figure out if something needs to be added to your grocery list. If you know what you’re making, make sure you have everything you need before you start. If you don’t, put it on the list and go get it.
  4. It runs on bluetooth and says it charges wirelessly, but it has to get its power from somewhere. Something still has to be plugged in. Who has enough outlets to plug in bases for all this crap? And I’m not sure if you’ve been paying attention, but hydro bills are already high enough without having to plug in all your fucking canisters.
  5. I know they claim it’s dishwasher safe, but a lot of things claim to be dishwasher safe, specifically things that warp and melt after repeated exposure to intense heat. Plus I’ve got this hang-up about putting anything with electronics in it near water because it’s just not a good idea.
  6. Maybe I heard this wrong, but I believe that video said that it knows about everything in your home. Do they seriously expect me to sit there and punch in every morsel of food I own? If yes, I expect them to go to hell and take their stupid jar with them.
  7. If your internet goes down, are you going to forget how to cook? Since you’ve paid good money for a jar that can tell you how to scoop and gives you recipes, signs point to yes. See you at your funeral once you starve to death, assuming there are enough family members left to get the GPS working.

There’s so much technical talent and brilliance in the world. It’s a shame to see so much of it wasted on shit like this. If these folks could channel all of that energy into solving problems that are actually problems instead of building toasters that can surf Pornhub, we’d have one amazing planet.

Black Friday Body Count: Quidco Down!

I didn’t know what a Quidco was until right this second, but if you do and haven’t heard yet, it’s currently down due to what is thought to be a Black Friday related server crushing stampede.

Quidco, the cashback site, has gone TITSUP amid a push to encourage British consumers to engage in the US-imported Black Friday sales fest.
The business operates by transferring third-party commissions (gained via its affiliate network) which retailers pay to referrers, on to its own members while taking a cut itself.
But very little seems to be happening on Quidco in recent hours with an unspecified issue taking the website down – on the busiest sales day of the year for retailers.

The homepage at Quidco currently claims that the site is undergoing maintenance and a message to visitors explains: “We are updating the site at the moment. Sorry for the inconvenience, service should be restored shortly.”

Be careful what you wish for, guys.