I’m Thankful For Free Turkey

Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and settle my guilt?”

“Certainly not,” said the Priest. “As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it.”

“I tried,” Brian sobbed, “but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?”

“If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family.”

Thanking the Priest, Brian hurried off.

When confession was over, the Priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his turkey.

The Only Cranberry Sauce Recipe You Will Ever Need

From wherever we are, Carin and I would like to wish all of you a happy Thanksgiving. Seriously, we don’t know where we are right now. If all has gone according to plan we’re at home, resting off the weekend trip we took in order to play with babies and eat turkey with her family and preparing for the start of a day trip to play with babies and eat turkey with mine, who live much closer. If things haven’t gone according to plan, then well…I dunno. Your guess is as good as mine. Actually that’s a lie. My guess will be better because we’re there and you’re sitting here wondering what the hell I’m talking about.

But as you sit there wondering about that and awaiting whatever the holiday has in store for you, please enjoy our best wishes and this lovely cranberry sauce recipe courtesy of Rex Murphy, a Canadian institution if ever there was one.

Talk to you all soon…probably.

6 Things That Have Nothing To Do With Thanksgiving But We’re Going To Say They Do Because It’s That Time Of Year And We Need The Clicks

I’ve seen websites go to some pretty great lengths to tie content into a holiday theme, but this is one of the weirdest listicles I’ve ever seen.

In an attempt to make you feel better about having to spend time with your family on Thanksgiving, the Crime Feed blog which can be pretty good sometimes put together a list of 6 DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY CRIMES THAT’LL MAKE YOU APPRECIATE YOUR OWN BROOD THIS THANKSGIVING.

“This could be fun and whimsical,” you may be thinking to yourself. and if you’re a fan of murder, then you’ll be soaking in whimsy until everyone else wakes up from their turkey coma. But if you’re looking for anything about Thanksgiving, you’re shit outa luck, I’m afraid. Exactly 0 of the crimes have anything to do with Thanksgiving, only fitting into the holiday spirit narrative because they’ve been awkwardly shoehorned into it by the person who created it in the hopes of cashing in on people Googling the word Thanksgiving.

It’s not even like the article itself is all that bad. I learned a few things from it. But why couldn’t it just stand on its own? Did it really need the haphazard, poorly thought out clickbaity Thanksgiving theme? Please everyone, don’t do that. And if you ever catch me doing it, please yell at me.

Massive Tansy update comin’ in.

I looked at the Tansy category, realizing that I haven’t written about her in a while, and my! Last time I mentioned her was Canada Day. Then again, I haven’t been much for posting these last few months. I’ve had lots of ideas, but never enough time to get them all down. So I figured I’d get some things taken care of, since I like having things written down to look back at.

One of the things we discovered last year was Bailey’s Local Foods. They need their own post just to sing their praises, but that will come at a later time. We haven’t been there in a long while, mostly because construction in that part of town sucks major balls. The point is they are an online farmer’s market like the 100-mile market, only they seem to have had more stable success. But when we would bring food home from there, we noticed something. Tansy would go nuts! More often than not, we would find her staring longingly into the kitchen drooling if we were doing anything with any of the food from there. Tansy has good taste. Trixie had good taste too when we would shop at the hundred-mile market. They used to deliver it to us. Once, she jumped into one of the boxes! Woops! I just think it’s crazy how both dogs could tell that that food was a special brand of awesome. They’re right.

Even though Tansy is almost 4 and a half, she’s still crazy hyper. Steve joked once that the next time someone asked me what kind of lab she is, I should answer with, “meth.” That would raise some eyebrows.

I still laugh at the things she gets excited about. If Steve asks, “Want a beer?” She starts bouncing as if to say, “Yes please! That would be a great idea!” I have no idea why this phrase gets her going so nuts, but reliably, it does.

She also starts getting really excited if I say “Woo!” in this certain way.

I always said that I was so happy that she’s not a humper dog, which I like since she seems like she could be quite dominant. Well…I found out in June of this year that she will hump another dog…and that dog is my brother’s wee tiny dog Zoe, the perpetual motion machine I wrote about a while back. I was shocked when I let them out in my brother’s backyard, and when they weren’t running, Zoe would try to climb on Tansy, and Tansy would hump her! Tans outweighs Zoe I think by 5 times. That’s evil!

At Thanksgiving, Tansy got more Zoe time. Tansy and I went home with my brother, his wife and the wee little guy who is 8 months old now, woe! Of course, Zoe came too. We all went home to my mom’s place and I think fun was had by all. Thankfully Tansy didn’t hump Zoe at all.

But we figured out the way to keep both dogs from just endlessly running around the house in circles and causing chaos. If you give them each a bone and their own bed, after a little bit of playing, they’ll each chew on a bone and veg out on their own spots. I wish I’d got a picture of them napping side by side. All I got was this one.

If I got the right picture, it's Tansy, a big black lab, next to a much smaller dog. I think this picture might look like an action shot, neither of them would hold still.
Is this a picture of Tansy and Zoe? If I remember correctly, neither of them kept still.

I’ve also learned that Tansy didn’t like being put away in the bedroom like she asked to do last year. I put her to bed there and shut the door and went out to hang out with the rest of the family, and heard this weird sound that sounded like a combination bird shriek and dog bark! I heard it all the way out in another part of the house, and my folks’ house isn’t exactly small. Whenever I would go listen, she wouldn’t make a sound….but I’m pretty sure that sound was her.

Since Tansy is so rambunctious, I haven’t exactly let her and the little baby be loose together much. But I did put her on leash and try to show him how to pet her. She seemed to enjoy that, and rolled around on the ground letting him rub her belly and stuff.

Somehow, during that trip, Tansy’s GDB dog tag fell off. I’ve seen instances where all the dog tags fell off, but I’ve never heard of losing just one. I think I know where it happened. I was getting out of the car so we could take the dogs for a pee and get a coffee, and I heard this little “tingalingaling.” I checked my pockets and saw everything was there, and then just assumed it was something someone else dropped and went on with stuff. No one else saw it either. I think that was when it fell. So, I don’t think I’ll ever get it again. At least that tag is easily-enough replaced, easier than the Rabies one or the Avid one. I’m waiting for a replacement tag from the school, but that’s a new one on me.

Tans has had to go to the vet for her first ear infection back in September. Her ears are so awesome that I often don’t have to worry about them. But I noticed one ear getting kind of crusty, so took her to the vet and they had a look. Sure enough, it was barely the beginning of an infection. Thankfully, after we treated it, things seem to have gone back to normal on that front.

But I have found a couple little bumpy things on Tansy, so of course, given my history of lumps, I had them investigated. They both appear to be benign cysts. I’m supposed to keep an eye on them and make sure they’re not growing. So far, so good. She also developed some dermatitis. I think it’s getting better, but I can still feel some of it. Keeping an eye on that too. Thankfully this year when she got vaccinated, she didn’t develop a big ol’ lump at the site like last year. Why is it that all my dogs develop lumps? I’m not even counting the old dog lumps that Trix got, but Babs had some kind of massed cell tumour, and Trix developed 2 sebaceous cysts. Now Tans has bumps. Doggies, you’re giving me a complex!

Here’s another weird thing I’ve noticed lately while grooming her. I’ll be grooming her and everything will be fine…and then she’ll start whining. I thought maybe the furminator had hurt her, but she even did it today when I was just using the Zoom Groom. Sometimes I’ll completely stop grooming her and she’ll still keep whining. Did something hurt once and she’s afraid it will again? Does she have a sore spot? What is this? Grooming is supposed to be fun!

Another thing I’ve noticed with Tans is once she loses hair on a spot, it’s hard as heck to get the hair to grow back. That bare spot I caused by not loosening the belly strap in time is still there. She has some other spots on her belly that have been bare since I got her. I don’t know what’s up with that.

And the last medical-related thing, at least once a year, Tans will have an incident where she will barf, seemingly without obvious provocation. The first one was in July of 2013 when she was pretty new. The next one was last September when I was starting to get really sick with the captain, and this year it was in August. I think I can blame this one on a toy getting a rip and she might have eaten a bit of stuffing, but I think it’s weird that every year, just once, around the same time, she has a major meltdown. Well…at least it’s not more often.

She continues to show that she’s super good at picking up patterns. Steve changed the ringtone on his phone, and now when she hears this new ringtone, she thinks it’s the buzzer and heads for the crate. It’s adorable and makes me chuckle.

She also knows what I mean by “turn around.” Funnily enough, she responds when I’m grooming her, but it doesn’t work where I wish it would, on the bus when I’m getting seated.

A bunch of other people around me moved desks, and instead of sitting beside Janna who Tansy loved, I now have a guy next to me. Tansy has discovered that he too loves dogs, and has fallen in love with him. I think it also helps that he babysat her when Steve and I went to a Blue Jays game back in September. But at any rate, when she sees him, she goes a little crazy, and she runs to him after she eats her dinner. I’m so glad he likes her back.

Oh my goodness, I failed at documenting something pretty important back when it happened. Oh well, I will write about it now. Tansy’s first Halloween was…eventful. Our area got very decked out in decorations, and I think we had to avoid some spider webs and other hanging obstacles. Then, a guy who Tansy tended to like wore a mask with horns and other scary things, and she decided he was evil and not to be trusted. Then some girls from HR dressed up as Sesame Street aliens. In case you’ve never seen these things, here’s a refresher on what they look like. Anyway, they happened by our area….and Tansy couldn’t take it anymore. She bolted from my cube area and chased them! Thank goodness for quick-moving office mates. I was calling, and she was looking at me, and decided not to come. Those human sock puppets were way too interesting. Let’s just say she spent the rest of the day on a leash.

Then last Halloween I was sick and at home thanks to the captain. So when this halloween came around, I didn’t know what to expect.

I decided to let her be loose until I heard people coming around, and I definitely had her on a leash when the floor filled with kids of my colleagues. Thankfully this prevented any disasters, but it wasn’t like Sesame Street aliens or horned masked things were in our area.

But I did feel her actually trying to hold herself together. Janna came around with her kids, and I could feel her trembling. At first I thought it was because she was afraid, which I had a hard time believing, but I soon figured out she was trying soooooo hard to control her impulse of “Jump on them! Jumpjumpjump!”

And I think that is the sum of all my Tansy updates. It’s hard to believe we’re headed for another winter, another Christmas, another set of anniversaries. Time really does fly faster and faster.

Stabby Thanksgiving

Daring to start Thanksgiving dinner before your drunk girlfriend wakes up? That’s a stabbin’. Or maybe a carvin’ would be more appropriate, given the circumstances.

Smith, 45, told officers that he had argued earlier in the day with Blake, who was reportedly intoxicated and had gone upstairs to sleep. While Blake snoozed, Smith began Thanksgiving dinner without her.
When Blake awoke to discover that the festivities had commenced in her absence, things got bloody.
Cops charge that she grabbed a knife and chased Smith around the dinner table. After dodging several stabbing attempts, Smith got knifed by Blake (who also threw the weapon at Smith, striking him in the face).

Police arrived as Jack-Lyn Blake was leaving, at which point they say she admitted to stabbing him. Always nice when the investigations are so easy on a holiday, I’ll bet.

She was arrested and charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, reckless endangerment and making terroristic threats.

Victim Benjamin Smith was taken to hospital for treatment of a non-life-threatening chest wound. Any time a story involving you, a crazy person and a knife ends with the words non-life-threatening chest wound, you shouldn’t have to think too hard about what to be thankful for.

Turkey Day

If you were wondering how Gill spent her Thanksgiving, wonder no more. Sounds like a nice time.

The Table is set, all the relatives are there, and dad pours the wine. This is tradition for most folks on any major holiday. Today I am going to walk you through my Thanksgiving, so try to get comfortable.

A Smart Phone For My Uncle

In future blogs I will further introduce you to my uncle Greg. Every family has someone like this. Last Saturday I, along with my sister, uncle, and one of my dad’s cousins went to the Rogers phone store. This was mostly my sister and my dad’s cousin’s idea. Bringing uncle Greg in to the tech age, by giving him the ability to text and send e-mails from a phone around the size of my hand. Once that was done, my sister showed him how to activate Blue Tooth in his truck.

What’s For Dinner?

Thanksgiving at my folks mainly consists of crackers and cheese in the afternoon, cards, and loads of laughter. Dinner is most often chicken, but this year was slightly different. We had turkey, stuffing, a time honored sweet potato casserole with brown sugar and pecans, cranberries, root vegetables, beets, carrots, potatoes, etc, and of course pumpkin pie.

Comments

I would often pass on it until last year, but now that I have tried it, I find I am all about pumpkin pie. I also quite enjoy the traditions, gathering around a table made by one of my great-grandfathers, the love it takes to prepare a feast, and of course my family.

>Thanksgiving, and Other Rambles

>I just felt like rambling, and since the blog may get a little quiet over the next couple of days because Steve and I are both running off to Thanksgiving stuff, what better time for a ramble fest.

First, happy Thanksgiving to all the Canadian readers. Hope you have lots of yummy food and pleasant times with family. It doesn’t seem like it should be already Thanksgiving, but here it is. I’m glad the weather is being nice and giving us what is supposed to be a weekend full of sun. Now that I’ve said that, it’ll pour.

I was talking to Ro earlier in the week about Thanksgiving and saying that I have no idea why we celebrate a holiday with the same name as Americans at a different time, and that makes me feel like one of those stupid people in those videos that we’ve linked to before, who have no idea about the most basic things. So I decided to see if I could figure it out. I was hoping for some cool, exciting explanation that I would be able to remember, but all I can find is that ours is more connected with European festivals celebrating the end of the harvest and being thankful for having enough food for the winter, where the American Thanksgiving is all about the Pilgrims and the Mayflower and stuff.

The funny thing about that is we learned about the Pilgrims and the Mayflower in school when they explained the meaning of Thanksgiving. Then I’d get so confused when people told me that American Thanksgiving is at a different time. So, I’d wonder, did the Mayflower make a stop and drop off some Pilgrims, and then move on? God I was a silly kid.

This is a terrible thing to say, but I always get a wee bit sad about Thanksgiving ever since one guy told me what he thought of the holiday. I was working at the crisis line, and I asked a fellow volunteer what I thought was a pretty safe question. “So, are you doing anything for the long weekend?” He looked at me, and there was a long, heavy silence, after which he said “No. I don’t celebrate it. I always thought it was a pretty dark celebration. We say it’s about giving thanks for finishing a journey, but we’re actually celebrating taking advantage of a whole people. We’re celebrating an exchange that went like this. ‘Hi Mr. Native guy. Here’s some beads, give us your land.'” I always knew that was part of it, but um, to have it put out like that made me just feel a teeny weeny bit guilty about chowing down on Turkey and stuffing.

But then I thought hey, we celebrate easter, and somebody went up on a friggin cross for crying out loud. If we can eat yummy chocolate then, why can’t I enjoy some turkey now? Writing that, I feel a wee bit like an asshole. I hope it makes sense though.

I know one thing Trixie is thankful for, this new food I switched her too. Holy hell, Wellness Fish is the fountain of youth for Trix. She’s so much more full of life and joy. I didn’t think that was possible but apparently it is. I also have to feed her a little more, because she peeled off too many pounds. The boodog is not supposed to be only 50 pounds. Eek! But I think this food is the right stuff, because she didn’t need her anal glands done at the time when she usually should. Yea! And so far, no constipation issues. I wish I could remember when the poopy problems started with the Orijen fish, because I don’t know if we’re out of the woods yet, or if we haven’t hit them. She started eating Orijen mid May, and I know there was a serious poop problem by the end of June, but it had already been building for a little while. So I guess I won’t be able to really jump for joy until November. But so far, so good.

One thing she’s doing more of is drinking, which means she needs to pee more. I don’t know if this is something to worry about, perhaps a new normal because of the composition of the fish-based food, or something that will level off. I know her urine was fine as of September because I got all scared at the beginning of September and took her for some tests, and they came back normal. I feel a bit paranoid for getting worried, but I guess it’s better to be safe than sorry. At any rate, everything came back normal, so if there is a problem, it’s a relatively new development. I guess I’ll just keep an eye on it.

Yesterday marks the first day I pissed off Trekker. Well, not really pissed it off, but yesterday was the first day I couldn’t follow the routes it was setting for me, so it had to keep rerouting.

I’m going to say again that I looove my Trekker. I never ever want to be without GPS again. I can get lost now and it’s not a big deal because it will keep telling me where I am, so I can figure it out with relative ease. It’s like sighted folk walking around reading street signs.

I decided yesterday I was going to go on an adventure. I was going to find our polling station so we wouldn’t have to tag along with someone if for some reason it didn’t suit to do that. So I grabbed my Trekker, and off Trix and I went.

I had plotted a route to the polling station, so I started following it like a good little sheep, baaa baaa. But as I happily zoomed along, what’s this? The sidewalk ends? Oh dear, oh dear dear, this is no good.

So, I managed to get myself to a place where there was a sidewalk, and continued. Trekker noticed I wasn’t where I should have been and rerouted me. We arrived at the polling station, sort of, and it got all happy.

Then, I tried to go back. Somehow, I got myself all turned around, to the point where it was naming streets that the bus travels on its way *away* from my house. Oh my my, this was no good at all. Knowing when I could use a wee bit of help, I asked Trekker to plot a route back home. And it did, and I tried to follow it.

As I did, I hit some nice unhappy construction, and had to walk on the other side of the street from where I should have been. Trekker kept trying to tell me to cross the street, but I couldn’t because there was no crosswalk from my side over to that side. Oh Trekker was not a happy man. “You are off route! Please turn back!” Oh if only I could, buddy.

Finally I got to a light where I knew I could make the crossing. I did, and boy was Trix happy to see familiar turf. I think she knew we were somewhere a bit unfamiliar, and got a bit lost. But she was a trooper, leading me through torn up streets, saving me from falling into pits, just being generally awesome.

But the thing is this whole time, I generally knew where I was, so it wasn’t the least bit scary. When I called Steve to say I was on my way home from my adventure, I was laughing! If I didn’t have GPS, I’d probably be about ready to kill things. Also, Trekker helped me figure out an easier way to get to the place. It’s probably a bit circuitous for Joe Sighty, but it involves less crossings and more unobstructed sidewalk than the other way. Now, if Trekker lied to me and the polling station is on the other side of the street, I’ll be slightly mad. But at least I’ll be way closer than I would have been with no guidance at all.

I have learned something from someone else’s misfortune. One of our frequent commenters, Martin, said that he and his guide dog had a less than pleasant meetin’ with a skunk. In telling his story, he mentioned that he got a product from the vet called Skunkoff that worked well in deskunking his poor unfortunate canine. What? You can have a product on hand for just such an occasion? You don’t have to cook up a potentially explosive concoction? Yea! I’m a fan! I’m going to have to see if my vet has just such a thing hanging around.

I’ve noticed that I tend to end these rambles with the eyebrow-raising things that Joe Public does. So, here are a couple. One question that always cracks me up that I get on a pretty regular basis is “Would you like some help putting that harness on?” My first thought is how do they think I got it on in the first place? I’d understand it maybe if my hands were full or something, but I get this question when I have nothing in my hands, not even a bag of dog crap.

Then I remember how complicated the harness seemed to me when I first got it, so I think maybe they think it’s a two-person job or something. But when you think about that, wouldn’t that suck to have a dog that belongs to one person using a harness that required multiple sets of hands to put on?

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate offers of help. I especially appreciate it when people offer to hold stuff so I do have hands available to put on the harness. But offering to put the harness on is kinda like offering to help me zip up my pants. I have to do it on a daily basis, and I *should* be able to do that without any help because it’s a one person job.

The one that super cracked me up was when Steve and I got off the Megabus when we went to see Barb. Immediately, I noticed that Trixie was walking with a hippity hop gait. I asked the folks helping us to stop because I had to check the harness. Sure enough, Trix’s front legs had popped through the front of the harness. So, I had to fix it. I bent down and unbuckled the harness. Instantly, the fellow leading us had a canary! “It’s undone, let me do it up!” No, sir, I’m fixing it. “But it’s undone, let me help you do it up!” No, sir, I have to get her leg back to where it should be. Eventually, I just ignored him, fixed the harness, buckled it up, and we went on our way. But it cracks me up that people think I can’t handle something like a dog harness.

Another thing that kills me is when people state the obvious. Allow me to explain. Trix and I went to the store. The store is in a little plaza, the one with the roof, where Trixie wanted to hang out during the rainstorm. When I came out of the store, Trix immediately sped up. This was not happening for any good reason, so I brought her progress to a sudden halt and had her sit. After a second or two I told her forward and steady. Speed again. No, beasteroo, that is not on the program. Sit. Down. Sit. Down. Sit. Down. Are we good now? We appeared to be, to the point that she was carefully edging along. Suddenly, I heard some slight yeeping coming from ahead of me, along with clicking of nails. Ah! It became clear to me. There is a dog ahead!

As we got closer, I noticed that this dog a. was standing outside the door of a building, taking up quite a bit of what is the sidewalk in the plaza, and b. had become very still and quiet. This made me very nervous. This can mean two things. Either the dog is well-behaved, or he’s poised ready to pounce on us if we get within a set perimeter that he has decided is his personal space bubble. I came to a stop and assessed the situation a little bit. But of course, Trix was not happy with the fact that we had stopped, and her resistance to this temptation began to dwindle. She started to yeep and move as if she’d like to say hello. Just as this happened, a woman walked up to me and said “there’s a dog there.”

Well, duh. Thanks for comin’ out. If the dog had made no movements and my dog wasn’t moving and I couldn’t figure out what was obstructing our way, then yeah I guess I could understand telling me that there’s a dog there. But a. I’m correcting my dog, and b. I think I’d just finished saying aloudd, “Ah! There’s a dog there!”

What would be extremely helpful information in a situation like this would be information about the other dog. Is it loose or tied up? What about its posture. Is it looking like it’s about to pounce? Or, is its tail wagging? Are its ears tense or relaxed? That would tell me whether I could probably zip by, or whether I should take the long way home. but “there’s a dog there” is not helpful.

Next, this woman thought she would assist me in getting past the dog by grabbing a hold of Trixie’s harness handle. Just for future reference, this will get the same response as grabbing a guide dog’s leash. Please don’t grab any part of the dog. For one thing, that puts your feet really close to mine which means I or the dog might step on you, and for another, it makes it super hard for the dog to do its work because you’re kind of right where it’s trying to go. If you really think the guide dog isn’t doing what it should because it’s distracted, and you don’t think the dog we’re trying to pass is vicious, offer to guide me past the dog. This will do two things. You end up between me and the dog, so Trix may not look at the dog as such a temptation, and you’re not in the way, taking up a little more of what little sidewalk we already have.

I was already on edge because we were near a dog and I didn’t know what kind of dog it was, so the poor woman got told to let go of the handle in not such a nice way. First I told her quietly to let go, but she didn’t, so I raised my voice just a little. Nope. Finally I yelled at her to let go of the handle and she did. I feel bad whenever this happens because I don’t want to be the angry blind woman, but gees, please listen to what I’m saying.

Once again I feel guilty writing these things because I don’t want to make people afraid to help blind folks. Really, we don’t bite. But I hope that what I offer as suggestions are helpful ones that make sense.

And I think that’s about it for now. To everybody who’s getting ready to feast with family and friends, have a good one.

Sibling Pievalry

I was beginning to wonder how it could be that we made it through a holiday based pretty much entirely on food without hearing about anyone getting beaten with some of it. Well,good things come to those who wait.Thank you, yet to be identified Texas brother and sister.

The 26-year old brother from Texas City and 23-year-old sister from Alvin began arguing at their parents’ home in Algoa about 4 p.m. Thanksgiving Day.

As the dispute grew heated, the brother threatened to heave a piece of pecan pie that he was warming in a microwave oven, Tuttoilmondo said. An attempt by the mother to calm the argument failed and the brother carried out his threat, shoving the pie in his sister’s face.

Sheriff’s deputies were called and the sister sought medical treatment for burns to the left side of her face and neck, Tuttoilmondo said. She later tried to have the case dropped, but under Texas law, family violence cases must be prosecuted.

Police are currently working on the warrant for the brother’s arrest, so the story about him being put to death should be on its way any time now.

>They Like Us! They Really Really Like Us!

>Thanksgiving award

Ro gave us a Thanksgiving award thingy. What a sweety. I swear we’re the same person sometimes. I’m happy we never scared her away way back when she started reading our crazy stuff.

So the rules are you’re supposed to pass this award on to five other blog authors who you think deserve a little something and explain why. Even though our Thanksgiving was done a month ago, this is cute anytime of the year, so off we go. Damn it I’d give it to Ro, but she already got it, otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten it! And damn it, I’d give it to Emily, but she’s already become a lucky recipient. By the way, Emily, congrats about Douglas! That is so awesome.

Hmmm. Where do I start? Maybe I’ll start with Andrea because without her, we wouldn’t have this new template. She seems like a fun person, and her little girl sounds cute cute cute!

The next one I want to give a little something to is Ann Adams. I wish I’d been able to meet up with her when I was getting Trixie. She’s just all around cool, and she sometimes makes me think. I feel like I know her even though we’ve never met.

Another blog that can either be hilarious, heart-wrenching, or a combination of the two, is Sweet | Salty. I first started reading her when she had her twins way early and one of them was in rough, rough shape. Sadly, he didn’t make it, and she wrote about the whole experience with such realism and deep feeling that you couldn’t help but feel like you were right there with her. She’s now written a kid’s book, and I’m sure it’s friggin awesome. I still wonder if it’ll be available in alternate formats.

Jill is also awesome. She has lots of insight into both people and dogs. Speaking of Jill, hey, where’ve ya gone? We miss you on the comments! I hope you and Paxol are doing well. Please drop me a line some time.

And gees, how could I forget Thordora? Without her, I never would have met Ann, or Kate, or Andrea, since Ann introduced me to Andrea. She can be fun, and even her sadder, deeper stuff is thought-provoking. Plus I think everybody should watch this video. Isn’t Vivian cute? I wish I had one of Rosalyn as well, but all her damn video players are embedded as transparent, so if I want a video link, I gotta dig it out of the source code! Blech! And that one I just sort of knew how to quickly find.

Edit: watch ’em both run to the hills.

So congrats to our five recipients. You guys all rock.

Give A Dog A Bone? Not This One.

Back on Monday, Steve mentioned that Trixie started our week of insanity off with a bang. Oh boy, truer words were never spoken.

I went home for Thanksgiving. Things started off pretty well. At one point, my sister’s boyfriend asked if Trixie could have a bone. I wanted to see the bone to see what I thought. Oh my, it was a big bone. I asked him where he got it, and he said he got it from a butcher, and it was cooked and meant for dogs. It looked very strong and not easy for her to break up or choke on, so I thought ok, sounds good.

Later, dad said it looked pretty honkin’, so maybe he should cut it into two. He did, with a saw! I thought if you need a saw to cut through it, it’s probably safe.

Then I gave her a piece. She took it, and started gnawing on it. Before we knew it, the piece of bone was gone! Not worked down from big to small, gone. It didn’t exist anymore.

Then I noticed that she really needed to take extra trips outside all day, and she always had to do more than pee. I thought well, that was a lot of bone you ate there, pooch.

I went to bed thinking that if she did need something, she would wake me. She always had before. Not this time. I guess the poor thing knew she didn’t have time for such trifles as waking me. She booted it down the hall, looking for an exit nearest to a human. She found one, but the humans near the door didn’t get the message. And so…this was the first big accident she has had in the house. The poor thing, she really tried.

She apparently made two more of these trips before I even heard anything. My brother was in a bit of shock when mom and I came bounding out just in time to see him fling the door open for the dog. We freaked out a little because our yard isn’t fensed and I always leash her up. My brother threw on his shoes in case we had to chase down a dog. But after the poor thing exploded yet again, she came back to us.

It was then that she got sick…and up came chunks of bone. Dog, no wonder you’re sick! You’re not supposed to consume the damn thing. It was also then that I started to panic. I didn’t sleep a wink after that. All I could think was “Oh my god, she could have an intestinal blockage.” Visions of Trix having to go in for surgery were dancing in my head. And to make matters worse, I was six hours from my own vet. I’m sure the vet there would have done fine, but then there was the matter of eventually getting back home.

Whatever her fate would have been, I knew I wasn’t getting home that day with my sister since part of that trip would have been on a greyhound bus, and Trix was in no way ready to travel.

When I got up the next morning after not sleeping past 3, I was beside myself. It’s been a while since I’ve just openly bawled in front of mom, but I did that day. I blamed myself for letting Trixie have at the bone, I blamed myself for not watching carefully enough, anything I could blame myself for, I did. Mom had to tell me to “stop it!” Poor mom, she was probably frustrated beyond belief.

After not feeding Trix for about 24 hours since her last food, which she took pretty well, aside from running to every new person who got up as if to say, “Are you going to feed me? Maybe you can tell Carin she forgot to feed me!”, we started on some rice with boiled chicken in it. Wow, rice is amazing stuff. It wasn’t long before all the diarrhea stopped. And Trix thought this rice was pretty good stuff.

But once we got the diarrhea stopped, it was hard to get things started again. We gradually added food back in, but things were still pretty irregular. Finally, we were convinced she was good to travel, so mom and dad, being the sweethearts they are, drove me back here.

So the moral of this story is, no more bones for you, Trix! I don’t need any more heart attacks.