When Did I Find A Monkey’s Paw?

At about halfway through this year, I started to think that I had picked up a monkey’s paw. The basic premise of the Monkey’s Paw story is the paw can grant you wishes, but they all have hellish consequences. Here’s why I thought I had picked up a monkey’s paw.

As spring rolled on towards summer, a lot of things were happening at once. I was trying to decide where Tansy was going in retirement and tying up those loose ends. I was hearing about more and more people getting dogs and I was hearing they weren’t getting much notice. At the same time, GDB, the guide dog school I have chosen, made a request for updated medical information, which meant they might be considering offering me a class date. Plus, our company conference was fast approaching and I wasn’t sure if my dog plans would conflict with my conference plans. I said to myself “I just wish things would slow down.” Boom! Steve and I got COVID. That sure slowed things down, but not the way I would have wanted.

A couple of months later, I was not feeling ready for a presentation that I had to do on September 19. I was wishing for a reason to put it off for a bit. Then, my dad ended up in the hospital with a mystery illness, so I asked for more time. Then I was guaranteed more time when the Queen passed away, and everybody at the place where I was presenting took the day off on September 19. So…the presentation was postponed. I was hoping for the reason to not be so sad, but there goes the monkey’s paw again. At least the presentation ended up going well.

A little bit later, one of us joked that we wished we could have some free food randomly appear. Well, one night Steve went to take out the garbage and we found some random takeout food at our door that we didn’t order. It was cold, so it had been sitting there a while, so we know that who ever ordered it had probably had it replaced. But it was from Burger King, and we know Steve’s feelings on Burger King. Thankfully, nobody died from eating the food.

I had started to think I was in the clear, because I thought the monkey’s paw only gives 3 wishes. But when I read the story again, it gives four! So, if anyone hears me say “No, Monkey’s Paw, that’s not a real wish!”, you know why.

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1 Comment

  1. Once we figured out where it came from, I came pretty close to just tossing all that food straight in the garbage. But in spite of my history, I couldn’t bring myself to waste like that. But you can best believe I put every bit of it in the oven before anybody was allowed to ingest it.

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