In our last installment of let’s make fun of what Carin says in her sleep, I thought this little bit would be a thing of the past now that Santa had arrived. But apparently, it still has some life in it, although a little less.
There’s one interesting pattern we have noticed: if there is a massive increase in sleep jabberings, I might want to check the calendar and see if my mask and hose need replacing. It’s the weirdest thing. I don’t feel the mask losing its effectiveness, but as soon as I have replaced it, I marvel at how much less tired I am, and wish I’d done it sooner. Hopefully I’ll learn for next time.
Also, I have upgraded my water chamber to one that can handle distilled water and filtered water. This is such an improvement for when I’m travelling. I thought distilled water would be an easy thing to get, but I have found that it’s not. Not every drug store carries it! I went to a hotel in Anaheim, and we went to a Wallgreens and a CVS and neither of them had the stuff! We even tried a 7-Eleven and nope! I would have had to go to a Walmart or a Target that was much further away. We ordered it on Uber Eats, and the person tried to bring us something that was not distilled water because it turns out the place was out of stock even though it was marked as available to order. We eventually found it, but it was just so much trouble! If I can avoid that, I will. But enough Santa jabber. Let’s laugh at my sleeping antics.
Carin decided to give us one more for the road around 4 o’clock this morning.
“I had an identical idea,” she told no one in particular. “Gonna build a big ‘ol Courtney thing with plants around it.”
I’m fairly certain I know who Courtney is, but I’m not so sure what’s being built in her honour. Is it in her honour? Maybe it’s meant to keep her out of someplace?
I have no idea! Who knew I was also into landscaping in my sleep life?
Pretty sure this concept is still dead because her sleep machine is a miracle worker, but Carin’s nighttime brain is doing its best to try keeping it alive.
She’s still sometimes convinced that things are broken and need immediate, panicked repairs. Some things never change, I suppose. Unfortunately, now and then this involves her sitting up in bed, trying to turn off the damn machine and then not knowing why she did it. I’ve caught her at it a few times and managed to stop it, but there was one night when she beat me to it.
Carin: “Something needs fixing right away! This should only take a second.” *pushes button*
Me: “Did you just turn off your machine for no reason?”
Carin: “I do believe I did.”
So far, my favorite new era thing happened on Sunday night.
I rolled over, and all of a sudden…
Carin: “Oops.”
Me: “What did you do?”
Carin: “I just heard what they said.”
Me: “No one said anything. I just rolled over.”
Carin: “Oh. I thought I heard somebody making fun of me and my all masked up voice.”
It is amusing to make fun of her all masked up voice, I’ll admit. But it’s much more fun when everyone is awake to hear it.
By the way, “doe doe doe doe doe doe!”
Carin will understand that. And I’m pretty sure she won’t know what she was trying to tell me.
Hahahahahah! Nope I don’t remember the “doh doh doh doh doh doh!” one at all. But I guess I was sure something was broken. One night I shut off the machine in my sleep, and then I had a dream I was turning blue and had to be rushed to the hospital. Then I realized why I might have been dreaming that. The poor machine wasn’t doing its air foofing thing. And nope, I don’t remember telling Steve about people making fun of my masked-up voice.
That was pretty amusing. I wake up to Carin chuckling and saying “right, I get it. That’s pretty funny.” Of course I asked what it is she got, and she tells me “the joke that they sent out and put up. The one with the picture.” Then there’s a long pause. “I don’t know what it’s a picture of so I can’t explain it to you.”
And I can’t explain it to myself either. The picture is all gone.
This next one happened around the time when I probably should have replaced my mask.
Carin: *Shuffles around like she’s going to get up or shut off the machine*
Me: Whatcha doing?
Carin: Nothin’. Just sleepin’ over here.
And on a somewhat similar yet different note…
Carin: I see what you’re doing over there.
Me: What, sleeping?
Carin: I thought it was some of that freaky stuff.
Neither of us knows what that freaky stuff would have been.
Once, we were visiting a friend, and I yelled “Stop!” in the middle of the night. I think poor Steve was worried I would try and go somewhere or do something. Thankfully, yelling is all I did.
And then there is a large chunk of time when Steve can’t catch me jabbering until when I once again needed a new mask.
“Don’t you dare. Don’t…you…dare! Do not make me waste all that time on Google with the quack quack ducks.”
It’s really weird waking up and getting told that I said that, and having no idea why. Quack quack ducks? What are ducks doing on Google? Did ducks learn how to type? Kind of like monkeys and typewriters writing Shakespeare? Does Duck Duck Go have quack quack ducks too? Were the ones on google defecting from Duck Duck Go? I have so many questions. I thought maybe I meant quack quack docs, like fraudsters putting up websites that I found when googling my symptoms, but it seems to be ducks!
Steve says “It was definitely ducks. “This wasn’t one of those times when I woke up to you talking. I was already laying there awake and heard it clear as day.”
Carin was having herself a night on Monday. Twice I woke up to her saying “Dammit, I don’t have it. I thought I had it.” I don’t think either of us knows what it is. I definitely don’t. But my favourite was “What have ya got there, douche bag? I don’t think so. Nope…nope…nope…nope…nope…” I feel like there might be a story to that one. I hope she remembers it.
Hmmm. I don’t remember what I was dreaming, but I wonder if Domino was the douche bag. His hobby of picking up things off the ground is going to be the death of both of us. Yeah, I have a lot to write about Domino. A lot.
In the wee hours of this morning, as I lie softly sleeping.
Carin: “AAAAAAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! AAAAAAAAAAAAA!”
Me: “Are you ok?”
Carin: “Yeah. Think so.”
Me: “Are you having a nightmare?”
Carin: “No. I just thought you were having trouble getting out of the path of that crazy whatchamacallit.”
Me: “The what?”
Carin: *silence*
Once again, I have no memory of either doing this, or the dream that could have caused it. I have no idea what the crazy whatchamacallit was that was going to mow Steve down. I did have a particularly scary dream one night when I was away where I was convinced someone had rigged my CPAP mask and if I breathed just the wrong way, it would set off a bomb. I hope I didn’t say anything very colourful that night. At least I was downstairs so if I did, nobody but the dogs would hear me.
Twice last night, Carin woke me up laughing in her sleep. Like literally laughing. Ha ha ha ha he he he he he.
The first time I asked her what was so funny, she said “look at that nice display.” Of course, I asked what was in it. She said “I don’t know, I don’t have it right now.”
A few hours later when she laughed again and I asked the same question, she excitedly said “look at the bouncing boingy sproingly thing! It’s got springs! Where’s it going?” No clue what it was or where it ended up. I wonder if it was some sort of marvellous toy type situation.
I can’t believe I laughed in my sleep. I wish I could have seen that thing, whatever it was. But I have a new mask again, so hopefully Steve will get a few more months of peace before I pull any more stunts.