Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about what he had done, he couldn’t. The guilt and sense of shame was overwhelming. But every once in awhile he heard a soothing voice inside his head trying to reassure him: “Howard, don’t worry about it. You’re not the …
Category Archives: jokes
Reservations
It’s been kind of a slow day around here, so how about a random tasteless joke? A newly married couple show up at a hotel and ask for the honeymoon suite. “Do you have reservations?” inquires the receptionist. “Only one,” replies the groom. “She won’t take it up the ass.”
The Sahara What Now?
I haven’t posted a really stupid joke in a while and this one just hit my email so I think it’s time to fix that. A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. The very next day, a stumpy little man showed up at the camp with …
Speaking Of Penguins…
Carin’spenguin postreminded me of this old joke that I don’t seem to have posted here before. A penguin was driving through Arizona on a hot, summer Sunday when he noticed his oil light was on. He got out of the car and, sure enough, it was leaking oil all over the road. The penguin drove …
Diary Of A Snow Shoveler
I heard this years ago, but I got it again, and thought it was very fitting because of the winter we just had. DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER December 8: 6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by …
What If People Treated Cars Like Computers?
This sounds ridiculously similar to a lot of the people Carin and I help out with their computers. General Motors doesn’t have a help line for people who don’t know how to drive, because people don’t treat cars like they do computers. But, imagine if they did…. HelpLine: “General Motors HelpLine, how can I help …
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The Power Of Prayer
I thought this joke was pretty good, especially considering Carin’spostfrom the other day. In a small midwestern conservative town, there wasn’t a place to get a drink for miles around, so a local entrepreneur saw an opportunity: He started to build a tavern. Liking a “dry” town, the local church started a campaign to block …
Happy Birthday Carin And A Bunch Of Other Crap
So how’s everybody? Are you enjoying this weather? If your answer is yes and you live anywhere near me, you’re an idiot, plain and simple. I don’t like winter at the best of times, but things are really getting out of hand this year. One thing I’ve noticed though is that there’s a definite lack …
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More Things You’ll Never Hear In A Western Movie
A long time ago, I posted a list of things you’ll never hear in a western movie. Well, it turns out there are more of them, so… “As your attorney, I must strongly advise you against participating in that showdown in the middle of town. The liability issues are staggering.” “Well me, the construction worker, …
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Losing Your Load
I’m not generally a big fan of blonde jokes, but this one gets me every time for some reason. As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up to him. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window and …