A mother was sitting on the couch reading a book when one of her children walked up to her and said, “Mummy, why is my name Daisy?” The mother replied, “Because when you were born, a daisy fell on your head.” A few minutes later, the next baby walked up and asked, “Mummy why is …
Category Archives: jokes
Your Stupid Joke For Today
Judge: “You say you’re petitioning for a legal name change?” Leon: “Yes, your honor.” Judge (looking at petition): “I can see why, your name is Leon… Shitferbrains, is it?” Leon: “Yes, your honor.” Judge: “And what do you want to change your name to, Mr. Shitferbrains?” Leon: “Melvin, your honor.”
Playing With The Boys
I’ll take a moment to apologize for this one in advance. A little girl asked her mother: “Can I go outside and play with the boys?” Her mother replied: “No, you can’t play with the boys, they’re too rough.” The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked: “If I can find …
Son Of Da Beach
Two Italians, Luigi and Antonio, met on the street. “Hey, Antonio,” said Luigi. “Where you beena for the past two weeks? No one seen you aroun.” “Donna talka to me, Luigi,” replied Antonio. “I been inna da jail.” “Jail!” exclaimed Luigi. “What for you been in jail?” “Wella, Luigi,” Antonio said, “I was lying onna …
You’re All Gonna Hate Me For This
Q. What goes ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAA’?A. A sheep with no lips. Q. What do you call a fish with three eyes?A. Fiiish. Sorry, it’s just been way too long since I’ve done that. Besides, somebody said to me the other day that I needed to start posting more jokes again. I hope that man is happy.
Today’s Stupid Joke That Made Me Giggle Like A Moron
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, a death which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote “The Hokey Pokey”, died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for …
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A Little Bit Of Topical Humour
A baby seal walks into a bar. The bartender says, “What’ll ya have?” The seal says, “Anything but a Canadian club.”
Good Point
Q. How many Gay Rights Activists does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. a bulb shouldn’t have to change. Society should accept it as it is.
Things That Never Happened On Star Trek
This was emailed to me yesterday and I thought it was pretty funny. I’m not a big Star Trek fan myself, but I know a lot of people who are and judging from what I’ve seen and heard of the show through them, this seems pretty well accurate to me. *Things That Never Happened On …
Play A Jazz Chord!
For some reason, perhaps the slight buzz I’ve got going right now, this joke cracked me up. Yes, I’m well aware that it’s stupid. Stevie Wonder is playing his first gig in Tokyo and the place is absolutely packed to the rafters. In a bid to break the ice with his new audience, He asks …