Last Updated on: 12th November 2022, 06:55 am
I can’t be the only one who finds it a little bit creepy and distasteful when I open my email on a day like Remembrance Day to find businesses marketing whatever it is they sell alongside lest we forget messages. I’m not the easily offended type, but I find it gross. Do what you want with Christmas or Easter or Thanksgiving, but can you please leave Remembrance Day out of it?
Yes, I know there are those who don’t like all the marketing around those other holidays either, but face it, it’s here and it’s not going away. Those holidays, for better or worse, have been de-serioused.
Christmas, for example, has gone from child is conceived under some very suspicious circumstances, is born amongst animals and becomes the lord and saviour of all mankind so let us celebrate his birthday to fat guy enslaves midgets, exploits animals, breaks into houses worldwide and leaves forced labour presents for everyone so let us all get drunk and eat turkey.
Easter, too. Somehow it went from child from Christmas grows up, gets murdered, comes back from the dead and then disappears but is always watching over us to bunny breaks into houses worldwide and hides chocolate eggs under all your furniture.
You can participate in these less serious versions to whatever degree you choose, but in a broader sense, there’s no coming back from that.
But Remembrance Day is and should always be untouched.
Unless…
If the brands just can’t help themselves and must sell us things on a day during which we’re supposed to be reflecting on those who have died from or been permanently scarred by the horrors of war, allow me to offer an assist.
My photoshop skills do not exist, so you’ll have to do that part on your own. But what I do have is a concept.
How about a mischievous childlike elf dressed all in camouflage. We’ll call him the Amp Scamp. Every November 10th or Remembrance Day Eve if you prefer, he will overcome his physical challenges in order to break into houses worldwide because we’ve got to stick to the theme, and leave delicious treats like Big Foot, Butterfinger, Jawbreakers, Bugles, Warheads or anything else with a body part, war or weapon sounding name for the good girls and boys.
If that sounds like an awful idea to you, you are correct. But so is heavy-handedly trying to sell me chocolate today, so you started it.