Lex Distress

If Lex Luger is telling the truth here and I have no reason yet to think he isn’t, my mind is blown.

According to a story he told on a recent edition of his podcast, the WWF didn’t pay him anything for all the time he spent riding around on that damn bus before SummerSlam 1993.

Luger also claimed that he did not get paid at all throughout the summer because he wasn’t wrestling in the ring due to the tour on the bus.
“I didn’t get paid all summer. I got zero,” he said. “I wasn’t working. You know how it was back then. I didn’t have a guaranteed contract like WCW. My contract wasn’t guaranteed. No play, no pay. At least they paid for my hotel.”

I’ve heard plenty of stories about the company being ridiculously stingy with payoffs for TV tapings even for big stars (numbers as low as $50-$75 a night because the real money was made on the house shows and the pay-per-views), but this is insane! You send a guy all over the country on a meet and greet tour with fans designed to sell tickets and PPV buys, not to mention air video packages from that tour on every one of your television shows, yet somehow the guy isn’t working so you’re not going to pay him? Jesus! At least he got 50 grand for looking like a geek in the eventual championship match. That’s something, I guess.

Yes, Vince McMahon is a dickhead. We all well and truly know this by now. But somehow I’m still able to be occasionally surprised by it.

If WWE Is Going To Do Multi-Day Big Shows, They Should Do It With The Right Ones

I don’t think we need the two night SummerSlam we’re getting in 2026. I say this as someone who, even after four years, still isn’t sure we need the two night Wrestlemanias we’re getting now. They exist purely to wring money out of the fans who watch and the cities that host them. I know that’s the point, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

But if we’re going to go with this two night big event thing, there are plenty of shows each year where it would actually make sense. How about the Royal Rumble? Elimination Chamber? Money in the Bank? Survivor Series assuming we’re going to keep doing WarGames every year? These would all benefit from being stretched out,and for the same reason.

Having a men’s and women’s version of each of these matches is a good thing. But cramming them both onto one show means that at least one of them inevitably suffers, even if both are good. If you put one on each night, everyone wins. Big matches get the spotlight they deserve, which I’m sure would make the people beating themselves up to make them the best they can happy. The company gets the money from two nights of ticket sales, not like it needs it. And you don’t burn out your crowds by having them sit through a very long match twice, which makes for a much better atmosphere. that atmosphere will then make the shows seem more fun, and make more people want to watch or even go, which makes everyone more money. And that, as we’ve discussed, is the whole point of doing this weekend long festival thing to begin with.

WWE has announced today that Minneapolis will host WWE SummerSlam over two nights on Saturday, August 1, and Sunday, August 2, 2026, at U.S. Bank Stadium.
The 2026 edition of SummerSlam will be the first Premium Live Event in Minneapolis since TLC: Tables, Ladders and Chairs in 2019 and will mark the first time WWE will host a stadium event in the city. In addition to the massive two-night event, WWE and MNSE will deliver a host of fan and community events in the days leading up to and after SummerSlam.

Seems Like An Easy Choice

If you’ve spent your summer somehow not hearing anything about what’s going on with the election in the States, I’m sorry to have to do this to you. But at least it’s Randy Rainbow getting you caught up, so you should have as much fun as you possibly can for the next few minutes.

The thing that strikes me most here is that he’s singing all of these words to describe events that happened just in the last month or two. There’s a line near the start about him having rewritten the song six times. I’m not sure it’s a joke. American elections are dizzying and exhausting. I don’t know how, or for that matter why, you guys do it. Makes me feel silly for ever complaining about the frequency of elections in Canada, honestly. At least we have stretches of our lives where we’re not in an election cycle. You poor bastards always seem to be voting for something.

Anyway, I’d better go ahead and post this before it’s out of date again.

Cut It Out! You’re Bugging Me! Clean Up Your Act!

Call me crazy if you’d like, but for some reason I have a feeling that this unseasoned chicken thing isn’t the first time that this family has had a night like this.

When Deputy Kyle Burns and Corporal Simpson arrived, they were told the situation began when Anthony Harper was asked “why he didn’t season the chicken that was cooking so it could crust up,” the report says.
Anthony replied he didn’t know how to cook and that their grandmother would season it. Hope Harper then called Anthony a ‘dumb dog’, and Anthony became angry, shoving Hope into a table and punching her about five times.
The two continued to fight alongside another victim. Another person in the home then came out of the kitchen and fired a warning shot from a 9 mm handgun into the ceiling to break up the fight.
Hope then went into the kitchen and grabbed a steak knife. Anthony broke free from being held back after this and ran to his grandmother’s door for fear of his life, the report states.
Hope started swinging the knife towards Anthony, then the grandmother came out of her room, grabbed a broom, and started swatting Hope until she walked away and put the knife up.
Anthony grabbed a can of Raid bug spray and sprayed Hope on the face and neck. Hope then grabbed the can from Anthony and sprayed him back.

Hope and Anthony both said they wanted to press charges, so both were arrested, charged and later released on bond.

Hopefully at least one of them has the good sense to realize that both of them going back to the same house right now is a bad idea…what am I saying?

Calm Down, Man. Maybe He’s Just Flirting

Fun fact: Many years ago, I knew someone who was accused, among other awful things, of bestiality. Several of us knew about it, and we had a grand old time making fun of him for it. Thankfully he never tried to beat any of us up, not that he could have. In fact he seemed to enjoy the attention, which made the whole thing even weirder.

I mention that just so I can post this, which reminded me of those days minus the jail and the fighting.

An 18-year-old in Georgia has been in jail for two months, reportedly after his own father and sister told authorities of the alleged sexual assault of a donkey and a bestiality offense against the family dog, a Great Dane. Apparently others in the Monroe County jailhouse got wind of the particulars of the case.

The story so far is that an inmate who was aware of the particulars of the case against Weir started making donkey sounds, which set off the defendant to such an extent that he allegedly followed the inmate into a jail cell, attacked him by hitting him in the eye and ear, and then subsequently blamed the flare-up on the mocking noises.
The report said that the inmate didn’t fight back as the enraged bestiality suspect allegedly escalated the verbal altercation to a criminal battery offense.

Somewhere, Someone Is Kicking Himself For Only Asking For Six Grand

Stories about bank scams are getting to be a lot like stories about fireworks. It’s hard to find a really good one especially now that scammers have gotten more sophisticated and are able to fool people much more easily without a lot of those people having to be astoundingly dumb. But that doesn’t mean that now and then you can’t still strike it rich in the stupid mines.

This one starts out normal enough. Fraudulent activity has been detected on your account, we need you to move a bunch of money to a different account to protect it, please add this random person to your Apple Wallet, wind up losing $6000. A fairly obvious scam, but sometimes people panic and things happen.

But then.

When she got home the same man posing as a bank employee called her on Facetime. She said he told her they needed to do a full body scan to verify her identity due to a failed transaction. The woman told police she undressed and spun in circles on Facetime. When she heard the scammer laughing that’s when she realized it was all a hoax.

I think we’re done here. I cannot improve on this.

Meanwhile, Walkoff Made It Down Without Incident

This is very sad especially since she sounds like such a lovely person, but I can’t lie to you people. Even in my older, mellower state, someone named Rohloff…well…rolling off is still going to get a laugh and a post out of me.

By the time Grace Rohloff reached the top of Half Dome, smiling from ear to ear, the 20-year-old college student had experienced thousands of miles of hiking. 
The aspiring high school math teacher was no stranger to challenging hikes requiring cables, like the one at Angels Landing at Zion National Park, which she did in the snow. For the iconic hike at Yosemite National Park, which is around 16 miles, on July 13 with her father, Rohloff bought new hiking shoes to ensure she had the correct footwear.

But a storm appeared, turning the descent down the most difficult part of the hike —  the 400-foot section with cables — deathly slippery.

Rohloff lost her balance and slipped, sliding and tumbling down the granite mountain, said her father, Jonathan Rohloff. It wasn’t until rescuers arrived that he learned his daughter, whom he described as “fearless,” died.
She fell an estimated 200 to 300 feet, likely hitting her head on the rock on the way down, according to Jonathan.