There’s Too Much Meat In Those Pants

Last Updated on: 3rd December 2013, 10:20 am

I first read this story because it involved a dude stuffing 8 steaks down his pants and running off with them, and I thought he might have had a less than pleasant encounter with a police dog. But oh no, that didn’t happen. What did happen was pretty funny.

A store employee noticed that the guy was putting a whole lotta meat in his pants, called the police and took down his plate number before the guy drove off. But he didn’t get away clean. He smashed into another car in the parking lot before driving away.

Police just drove on over to his place, where they found a bag of steak, along with batteries and men’s underwear right next to the car. I assume all these items were in his pants, but perhaps not.

When they questioned the guy about it, he first gave them a false name. Unfortunately for him, the false name he gave had warrants! What are the chances of that? Did he know the guy whose name he gave? If he did, then wouldn’t he have known he had warrants?

They finally got his real name, James Young Jr. and charged him with a whole bunch of stuff, including leaving the scene of an accident and driving under the influence of alcohol along with the impersonation and theft charges you would expect. He would have had more charges if the woman he choked earlier in the day had wanted to press charges.

Also, Young was described as “hateful and obnoxious.” I have heard someone described as obnoxious before, but hateful? Wow.

What a special guy. Too bad he didn’t get to enjoy those steaks, because I think he’ll be in jail for a while, and I’m sure he won’t be getting any steak.

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