Two men are sitting at the bar at the top of the Empire State Building drinking, when the first man turns to the other one and says “You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the wind around …
Author Archives: Steve Wettlaufer
Vaseline And Dishes
A biker has always dreamed of owning a brand new Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money, so he goes down to the dealer to trade in his old rusty Harley for a brand new model. After he picks out the perfect bike, the dealer tells him about an old biker …
Have You Always Been Faithful?
A couple is celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary in a lovely restaurant. They’re talking about how happy their marriage has been and still is. The husband says, “We have been married for so long, 50 wonderful years, but there is something I have been meaning to ask you.” “Yes, dear, anything you want,” replies the …
Big People Words
The former kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on no baby talk. “You need to use `big people’ words,” she’d always remind them. She then asked Wendy what she had done over the weekend. “I went to visit my Nana.” “No, you …
That Bay Boom Was A Bit Bigger Than Expected. Sorry About That
Update: I think this one needs itself a soundtrack. The 4th of July. A time for our American friends to enjoy food, family…and 15 seconds worth of fireworks? Yes, that video is real. That gigantic explosion was what hundreds of thousands of people were treated to at the Big Bay Boom in San Diego last …
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If Missionaries Want To Win Converts, It’s All About Business, Not Bibles
In the last decade and a half or so, Christianity has become quite an appealing option to many of the Jarai people of Cambodia. The reason? Simple Economics. Traditional spirit god appeasement doesn’t come cheap, often costing hundreds of dollars in slaughtered animals and other goods. Since Jesus doesn’t make you part with that much …
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Watching The News On 9/11
This one’s not exactly topical anymore, but it got me. A husband and wife were watching the news on television: The devastation at the World Trade Center; the videos of different countries around the world crying with Americans over the events of the past few weeks; reporters updating and attempting to analyze political strategy; President …
Do You Like…?
Goldie was sitting on a beach in Florida, attempting to strike up a conversation with the attractive gentleman reading on the blanket beside hers. “Hello, sir,” she said, “Do you like movies?” “Yes, I do,” he responded, then returned to his book. Goldie persisted. “Do you like gardening?” The man again looked up from his …
Be Careful Who You Mary
Three couples, two straight and one gay, were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship. They all drowned, and soon they’re all standing in line before St. Peter. First up was one of the straight guys and his wife. St. Peter shook his head sadly and said to the man …
Friday Afternoon Batch O’ Jokes
*Q: Why doesn’t god like cheesecake? A: Because he doesn’t exist. *The other day, I bumped into a friend I’d not seen in ages. “Are you still seeing that girl Helen,” I asked? “Nah,” he replied. “It’s a sad story. She bled to death from gonorrhea.” “You don’t bleed to death from gonorrhea,” I said. …